Category: Faith Lived Out

What makes some people maintain that spunk and feisty spirit into old age? Is it a temperament they're born with or do they choose it?

I've wondered about that for years,. The other day I got an e-mail from a relative with a photo of my aunt, who lives in Minnesota. Aunt Elsie is my father's baby sister and the only one of those five siblings still living on earth.

At age 101, she maintains the spirit and humor I always loved as a child. Now she lives in an assisted-living residence and walks with a walker. When someone commented she gets around very well, she said yes, she does. Then she smiled her old smile and said, "And I would dance, too, if I had a partner!"

That doesn't surprise me one bit. I haven't seen Aunt Elsie for years, but I always delighted in how she seemed to have fun wherever she was. I remember so well her laugh and her sparkling eyes.

Yet that didn't flow out of getting all the breaks in life. She and her husband worked hard running their own business. Childless for many years, they adopted a daughter and shortly thereafter had three kids of their own. At age four their oldest boy received a brain injury as the result of another driver hitting him while he crossed the street. He came out of the coma, but never was the same, never able to keep up with his siblings.

But life went on and so did Aunt Elsie and Uncle Earl and the rest of the family. That catastrophe took awhile for all of them to take in and get used to. Mostly they coped. They never doubted that God let their son live for a reason and they wouldn't look back. They suffered through all the usual emotions and grief, but they survived…and kept on believing, kept on loving.

These two lived through the usual ups and downs of rearing children to adulthood–and much more, besides. Aunt Elsie dealt with illnesses and the death of two husbands. But she never gave up. She lives on and laughs and jokes.

All along the way, she had choices to make. Would she become a harpy? A bitter woman, angry at God, perpetually expecting disaster? And who would have blamed her if she had.

But she didn't. She chose to go on believing that God loves her and her family, and watches over all of them. I'm betting she has read Psalm 139 over and over, sometimes looking for answers to her whys and sometimes soaking up reassurance.

Since my mom died before she reached age 55, I look at older women for role models of how to do it. I look at Aunt Elsie and all the others who choose to go on living with gusto and faith every day of their lives.

To me they're shining examples of the truth of Psalm 92:12, 14-15:

The righteous will flourish like a palm tree…They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green, proclaiming, "The LORD is upright' he is my Rock, and there is no wickedness in him."

Let's choose to be ageless…fresh and green every day of our lives!

Here's wishing you JOY in your journey through life,

Lenore

Your comments welcomed!

The secret of youth–and it doesn’t come in a jar

October 21, 2009
Imagine standing where your front door used to be, looking up and down your street– and seeing only smoldering rubble.

No, it's not Baghdad or Kabul. It's here in California. Scenes like this are playing out all over the state.

If you live in another state, you might wonder why we have so many wildfires. For one thing, we have lots of hilly areas, with brush and trees growing on them. Homes, expensive homes, often dot those canyon areas. People build there for the privacy and the view.

With almost no rain from April or May until November, we get dry. So we Californians always feel a bit edgy when our weather turns windy, with low humidity. In the Los Angeles area people cringe every time wild Santa Ana winds howl through the canyons and humidity drops below 10 percent. Sometimes fires rage even without those "devil winds," as they're often called.

This year, for instance. Being in our third year of drought means that everything is as combustible as a pile of kindling. Warnings go out all the time to avoid anything that can strike sparks, to skip building campfires, to be sure barbecue grill fires are out, etc. Even then, "harmless" activities can be dangerous. Not long ago one enormous fire started when a fellow was mowing and hit a rock.

So far in the Sacramento area we've had some fires, but nothing big.

That changed yesterday. Our humidity levels hovered beween 10 and 15 per cent. Then came dry winds blowing at 25 mph.

In the middle of nearby Auburn, along a busy road right through town, a fire broke out. Flames quickly spread and burned uphill into a residential area. We saw the black cloud of billowing smoke–and smelled it, too. Firefighters turned out from all over. Nevertheless, by nightfall, sixty-three homes and three businesses had burned to the ground. Dream homes, picture-perfect homes on large lots, some new, some older…all of them gone. This morning's television newscasts show streets and neighborhoods with nothing standing, only ruins.

Some people didn't even have time to grab a picture album or any important papers. One said, "I was taking an afternoon nap and somebody banged on our door, saying the fire was fifteen feet from my place. I got out with only the clothes I was wearing."

The tight-knit community of Auburn grieves today, but they're pulling together, offering food and shelter. People like me feel sad, too, thinking what it would be like to lose everything. No one died, thank God. Yet the outward trappings of our earthly life do carry meaning, if only for sentimental value.

Of course, we needn't have our homes burn down to have our lives change in an instant. All it takes is a car accident, a nasty tumble, a dreaded medical diagnosis, the death of one we love or job loss.

So how shall we get through this risky business of living without quivering in a corner? I only know one way: Trust in the Lord.

Yes, it's true, Christians suffer loss and illness and death, like everyone else. But believing that we're not alone and knowing others pray for us lightens the burden, however crushing it may be. In the midst of the pain we trust that God somehow will bring good out of the experience. Over time I've learned that what makes no sense at the time almost always turns out to have a blessing hidden in it, even if we have to wait awhile to see it.

What helps me get through tough times is to cling to Bible verses that speak to my heart. For me, it helps to write them down, then reread them whenever my courage wavers. Repeating them to myself calms my spirit. Here are a few verses I have underlined in my Bible.

      I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O LORD, make me dwell            in safety.       –Psalm 4:8

God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.                –Psalm 46:1-2

   When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust;                       I will not be afraid.    –Psalm 56:3-4

Surely God is my help; the Lord in the one who sustains me. –Psalm 54:4

As we go about living our lives, let's be watchful, of course. But let's not give in to panic or constant low-level anxiety. All that does is churn us up even more–and our family members, too. We rob life of its joy.

Remember, you're in good hands–and I don't mean "with Allstate."

Peace and blessings,

Lenore

Question for you: Do you have a favorite Bible verse that blesses you? Why not share it with the rest of us? Just click on the word "Comments" below and a message form will pop up. Then follow the simple directions.

Terror on a Sunday afternoon

August 31, 2009
Schools around here are back in session–or soon will be. Kids of all ages, along with adults of all ages, are trekking back, or maybe for the first time.

Education is a wonderful thing. We say that all the time, don't we? And it's true.

Still, it takes courage to take that first step, whether you're a first-grader or an adult first-timer who's been away from school for a long time. There's a saying that goes something like this, "The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Beginnings are like that. The "first step" is the hardest. Each one that follows feels easier.

That truth applies, even when we're beginning a new way of doing things in our personal lives. What we know always feels more comfortable and safe than stepping off into the unknown.

Every one of us has "been there, done that" at least a couple of times. We all know that sinking feeling, that self-doubt that we can handle what's ahead. What to do?

One simple tactic is to change the way we think and hang a new label on what we're feeling. Instead of "fear" and "discomfort," we can call it "excitement." After all, can't you remember times when you felt excited and you had those same butterflies? Me, too.

So if you're stepping off into the unknown–or your children are–here's a benediction on your week and for this new undertaking. We sang it at church today. First our pastor sang it to us, all of us standing. Then each side turned to face the other and we sang it together, each side to the other side. How lovely to sing these words to the smiling folks facing us!

So I "sing" it to you, with all my best wishes.

As you go on your way may Christ go with you,

May He go before you to show you the way,

May He go behind you to encourage you,

Beside you to befriend you,

Above you to watch over,

Within you to give you peace.

God bless you, whoever you are–and thanks for taking time to read this blog now and then,

Lenore

Question for you: What new activities are you–or a family member–undertaking?

A benediction for your week–and your life

August 23, 2009
How's the mood at your house? Or in your mind?

Maybe we're all suffering from hearing too much gloomy news and soaking it up like sponges. No wonder we feel heavy.

Whatever the cause is–or isn't–we can do a U-turn in our thinking. Here's how, in the words of the Apostle Paul.

And now, dear friends, let me say one more thing as I close this letter.

Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right.

Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable.

Think about things that are excellent and worth of praise.

Keep putting into practice all you learned from me and heard from me and saw me doing, and the God of peace will be with you.

–Philippians 4:8-9 (New Living Translation)

Reading over that list, maybe you think this sounds like something you've heard on television. Just remember that the Paul and other Bible writers said it long before Oprah or Dr. Phil.

It's pretty simple, really. We're to keep putting the good stuff in (a la Paul) and commit our days and our future to God. He'll do the rest.

His peace to you, dear readers, wherever you are,

Love,

Lenore

Your comments welcomed!

Here’s a prescription for a healthy outlook

July 25, 2009
"My kids have been waiting for this to start ever since last summer!" said the smiling young mother as she wiped perspiration off her forehead. She swayed from side to side, keeping her toddler quiet. "I brought our three oldest, plus two neighbor kids. Where do I sign in?"

She and her kids were part of the impatient throng that crowded into our church for the first night of Vacation Bible School this week. "I love those hot dogs and watermelon!" her preschooler announced. "Are we gonna have 'em tomorrow night, too?"

I shook my head and answered, "I don't know what the kitchen crew is planning for tomorrow night. It's a surprise!"

Once their laughing, jumping group was through I turned to the next. For 20 minutes or so parents and kids kept a dozen of us busy. Most moms and dads delivered their youngsters to their appropriate age groups, then hung around, waiting to see how it went. They needn't have bothered. Their excited kids were having too much fun to miss them. Once the parents were sure of that they walked back past our table to the door. Their faces telegraphed their feelings: Yeah! Two and a half hours of free time!

As of last night we were up to 230 kids attending, ages three through middle school. So far both kids and volunteers wear joyful expressions. Volunteers number at least 75, with the youngest age 13. The oldest is 92, loved by every kid. He's a feisty fellow who cleans up, empties trash cans and never frowns. Young to old, we work side by side, whether it's food prep, leading, crafts, putting away outside equipment or mopping floors.

Are we volunteers having fun? Yes. Would we do it again? Absolutely. Otherwise, why would we come back every year?

Cynics might wonder whether any of the work or the expense is worth it. None of us knows…but God does.

What we know is that children arrive and learn about Jesus. They learn that God loves them and watches over them, so they need not fear. Kids take turns on the playground and wait their turns for snacks. They memorize songs about Jesus and friendship and being kind to others, then sing them while waving goodbye and skipping their way out of the building. Before, during and after this week, those children and their parents have been prayed for.

I know several adults who first heard about Jesus at VBS, maybe only once or twice in their childhood. Yet they heard the Good News and seeds were planted.

So we rejoice. These parents know our VBS costs them nothing except gas money. Members of our church give this as a gift of love. We think all of it is more than worth it, if only for the fellowship we have and the joy it brings us.

Believe me, we're not naive. We know for some parents all it means is a freebie, with child care as a bonus. That's okay. When a parent says, "This is our fourth/fifth/sixth year at your VBS. Our kids love it!" we all beam from ear to ear.

They're here. We plant the seeds. The rest is up to God and his Spirit.

Blessings,

Lenore

Question for you:What are your VBS memories? Why not share them with the rest of us?

Fun in the summertime–with VBS

July 15, 2009
This feels like a season of milestones, doesn't it? One school year ends, and kids move up a grade. Young people put on caps and gowns and march solemnly, stepping in time to (what else?) "Pomp & Circumstance."

Life is full of milestones, although often we don't recognize them at the time.

Last night we did. My husband and I proudly watched one of our grandsons graduate from high school. On a beautiful June evening we sat in a stadium packed with joyful parents and exuberant family members and friends. Judging from the noise levels, excitement reigned. The general attitude seemed to be, "We/They made it!"

Twelve years of education and hard work lie behind these high school graduates. Twelve years of Mom and Dad doing what moms and dads do, keeping an eye on things, loving their child, holding it all together.

Watching that crowd of bright, talented young people brought a lump to my throat. The future stretches before them, filled with promise and opportunity they can't foresee.

Graduations, however, always feel a touch bittersweet. As one of last night's speakers put it, "Now our years together come to an end."

Yet the flip side of this "ending" also is a beginning.

What we call an ending often ushers in the beginning of something not yet seen and more wonderful than we can imagine.

I'm newly aware of that right now. I recently spent time with an old friend who's in Hospice care. Following surgery and treatment for a malignant brain tumor, she's unable to speak more than two or three words. Her eyes and her typically beautiful smile, however, speak volumes, so she still communicates.

When I think of her and her husband, who has adored her since she was a teenager, I ache with sadness for them. Not so long ago their future stretched ahead of them and they dreamed wonderful dreams together. Now they can only look into each other's eyes and hold each other's hands every chance they get, hungry to hang on, yearning to freeze time and capture the moment.

Yet peace shines from their eyes and radiates from their body language.

Before them lies an ending, you say. Not really, not for these two. They both believe in Jesus and have built their marriage and raised their children in Him. So they know they'll be together again. They believe one's last breath on earth is one's first breath in Heaven.

One day my friend will "graduate" from earth. Before her will stretch a beautiful world the rest of us can't see…yet.

We'll call it an "ending," but for her, it will be just the beginning. She'll be "movin' on up!" for real.

And we will rejoice through our tears, just as we did at that graduation last night.

Blessings,

Lenore

Your comments welcomed!

Of endings…and beginnings

June 10, 2009
"We had such a wonderful life," the weeping husband told the counselor. "A good marriage, beautiful children, and we did everything right. At least, we thought we did. But now, now…What am I supposed to do now?"

The counselor, known by all to be warm and caring, listened awhile. His response sounds shocking at first. "What I hear you saying is that someone ruined your Camelot."

Remember Camelot? Flowers always bloomed and the sun always shone. Brave knights rescued every maiden in distress. Ladies in lovely gowns sipped tea and cakes, yet never had to boil or bake. Who wouldn't want to live in such a magical, mystical, mythical place?

Except we don't. We live in the real world, with real people.

More times than I want to admit, I forget that and set myself up for disappointment. Then like that weeping father, I grieve the loss of my dream and my self-image as much as anything.

Then what do we do? We love the sinner(s), as the counselor advised that dad to do, as God loves us. We take our pain to God, until finally we can leave it there.

Camelot would be a lovely place to visit, I suppose. But I wouldn't trade the joys and challenges of relating to real people.

How about you?

Blessings,

Lenore

Agree or disagree? Your comments welcomed! (Just click on the word, "Comments" in the small print at the end, then follow directions.)

Who ruined your Camelot?

April 3, 2009
    I don't know about you, but I'm tired of the continual doom-and-gloom talk everywhere we turn. I don't think it helps any of us.

    You know how it goes. One reporter will say, "If … then … and then … we could … ."

    The other talking head responds, "And that could lead to … which would mean that … and then … we'd have ____ more layoffs, which would mean ____ more people couldn't make their mortgage payments. Foreclosures will skyrocket in our area!"

    Nobody seems to notice–or care–that everything starts with that little word, "if."

    For two minutes or so they've drummed up emotion and fear. Their facial expressions and tone of voice make it plain doom is imminent! Yet not one real thing has occurred.

    It's way too easy to get sucked in to this whirlpool of misery. When I do it's no time until I'm venting to my husband … or vice versa. Soon we're forecasting personal doom based more on someone else's conjecture than on fact.

   That quickly snatches the sunshine out of a room … or a life.

    So let's not join that crowd. Here's my proposal for coping with what comes. First, let's get a realistic grip on what affects our own lives and concentrate our energies there. Manage as wisely as we can, cut expenses where we can, appreciate what we already have. Living bountifully has nothing to do with having money. It's all about how we view our life.

    Second, let's look at what really matters and focus our attention there. Most of us would say that people matter more than things. So let's invest ourselves in other people. It costs nothing to speak encouragement or give someone a hug … and most of us could use more of both.

    Finally, let's count our blessings … over and over again. I think that's more than ticking off a list. Let's form a new habit: Pay attention to what is, more than longing for what isn't. Each time we do we'll feel more confident, more sure of our life, more at peace.

    When we share a life, whether with a spouse or a child, little aggravations often cloud our vision. It helps to set them aside for awhile and look at this person with a stranger's eyes. Do we spot virtues we had been ignoring? Remember, small virtues count. (Ever forgotten to put out the garbage when your husband was out of town? Then you know what I mean.) If you feel shortchanged, ask God to enlarge your perception.

    If you live with those recording devices a.k.a., kids, remember that your attitude(s) become theirs. Your fear(s) become theirs … even when they never say a word or ask a question. No child ever is oblivious to their parents' state-of-mind.

    Finally, when it comes to fear, whether of recession, depression, or a change in government, let's remember who's in charge. Today I got an e-mail you may have received at some point, one with beautiful photography and a meaningful message. It points us to the verse in the center of the Bible: Psalm 118:8. This is the perfect motto for you and me in these troubled times … or any time.

It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.

    Next time we're tempted to sink in despair, let's go back to this verse and pitch a tent. Fortunes come and go. Governments rise and fall. Only One was there before the beginning and will be there after the end. Only One has proven to be absolutely trust-worthy over time. He's the one who watches over us and who blesses your life and mine.

    By the way, here's the address for that video I referenced above: 70670-TheBibleDV.pps (2473KB)   (Sorry, you'll need to copy, then paste it to access it.) Enjoy!

    Have a refreshing weekend!

    Lenore

    What do you think about this? Your comments welcomed!



Let’s not let talk of the “downward spiral” drag us down!

January 24, 2009
    That sounds like a pointless statement, I suppose … or maybe wishful thinking. Yet isn't that what we all long to do, from the day our children are born?

    Becoming a parent is like tapping into a vein of miracles. What parent hasn't fixated on tiny fingers and toes, imagining the future of our children? That miracle never stops, because all through their childhood years we marvel as we watch our kids change and develop.

    Some of us start off on this adventure feeling confident. After all, we've read stacks of books and observed all the ways other moms and dads mess up. We have no doubt we can avoid all those pitfalls. As a friend put it, "The only time I had all the answers on how to raise kids was before we had any."

    New parents often burst with pride. Others panic, afraid they're not ready. One new mom said, "I feel like I've been appointed 'it' for everything in my child's life!"

    Actually, that's not so far from the truth. After we become parents it's up to us to provide TLC, food, shelter and guidance, 24/7. Which one of us ever feels ready for that?

    Before long we realize we have more questions than answers. That state-of-mind turns out to go on all through our children's growing-up years, even though we're growing and stretching, too.

    So how do we "bless our children?" We give them what every human being longs for: the sense of being accepted and loved without ifs, ands, or buts. Some of us have experienced that and possess an inner security our entire lives. When we haven't, we may spend our lives trying to live up to what we think our parents wish we were.

    Most of us would judge that freedom to be a lifetime gift, but how do we give it?

    It seems to me it's more than just saying, "I love you," over and over. We also study each child, not just their behavior, but their strengths and weaknesses. (If one or more of your children seems out-of-sync with you, or challenges you, welcome to a very large club.) As we do that we're more able to cooperate with who they are, the individual God made them to be.

   How do we "cooperate?" Imagine you want to play an instrument. You don't make music with a violin by blowing on it and you can't play a clarinet with a bow. Even gifted performers still need to respect the inherent qualities and capabilities of their instrument. So they study and they learn and they practice until they can bring out its music.

    No two kids are alike, not sisters or brothers, not even twins. Each of us is one-of-a-kind. We bless our children when we allow them be who they are and find ways to help them develop the "music" inside themselves. To do that we keep on learning and growing–and praying–so we can parent them in ways that fit with who they are.

    By now you're wondering if my husband and I always followed this excellent way as we reared our four girls. We loved them dearly, and we tried with all our hearts and all our might, but we failed in lots of ways. We still do. Why? I've never found a better explanation than the Pennsylvania Dutch saying I spotted on a hearts-and-flowers wooden plaque:

"We get too soon old and too late smart."

     Parenting turns out to be a lifetime growth opportunity. Who knew? So we start where we are, taking a good, long look at our children and ourselves. If we feel in over our heads, we seek out guidance. That may be a trusted, comfortable friend with older children, one who can mentor us and give us a wider perspective. It may be our pastor or a counselor that's been recommended. (First take time to check and be sure the lives of people you turn to stack up with what you want for your own.)

    We give our kids a solid place to start from when they know we value them as individuals. Of course we need to plant the other good stuff, too, for balance. Is this easy? Almost never. Yet I've found that God is faithful to supply us with fresh strength for each day. One more thing. As we help our youngsters develop into the people God made them to be, we're doing the same for ourselves.

   Through the days of this year, let's do more than speak our blessings to our children and families. Let's be a blessing, as well.

   When you doubt your capacity, remember that our needs never outstrip His supply!

    Lenore

    Agree or disagree? Your comments welcomed!

A New Year’s resolution for mothers: I will bless my children this year … and all their lives through

January 6, 2009
    We're about to enter the New Year … 2009! A period of time as unknown to us as if we were following a mountain path into thick fog. We only think we know what lies ahead.

   I love some things about the arrival of another New Year, like putting up new calendars. Who could miss the symbolism of "off with the old, on with the new?"

    Whatever 2008 was … or wasn't … it lies behind us. Ahead lie 365 uncommitted days. Freedom! Freedom, that is, until I start writing in those unavoidables of life, the meetings and appointments already scheduled … and there will be more. That task makes me feel organized, but also weighed down as I watch those unsullied days fill up. Knowing I've chosen most of those commitments helps, but hey, they nail down my time. I'm one of those people who likes keeping her options open, because who knows what possibilities may arise?

    But then I get a grip. I wouldn't trade places with anyone. Many of those notations remind me that I'm needed, or I make a difference, or simply that I matter in someone else's life. There's nothing that brings more deep-down joy.

    At any point, you and I have this day, this moment. That's scary, but also comforting. We don't have to deal with 365 days, only the one we're living in. Still, beginning a new year feels like starting a journey, not quite sure where one will end up. None of can foretell what 2009 will bring.

    For years I had a piece of writing framed on my office wall, and I love it still.

                                               "The Gate of the Year"

    And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year:  "Give me a light, that I may tread safely into the unknown!"

    And he replied:   "Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God. That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way."

                                                                                        –M. Louise Haskins

     I can't say it better than that. So let's step off into the unknown with gusto! As long as we hold tight to the Father's hand, we'll be safe.

    May God watch over you and yours every day of the New Year!

    Lenore

    Your comments welcomed!



Are you ready to step into the abyss?

December 30, 2008