Category: Life Lessons

  • Here's a handy acronym to remember: W.I.A.T.                

    It stands for Wrong Ideas Appearing True.        

    Every one of us carries around at least a few of them in our subconscious.
    They lodge 
    Blog. Woman. Thoughtful. 5.20down deep, below the level of our awareness. We may have acquired them long ago, which explains why we have a hard time recognizing mistaken thinking.

    Yet these WIATs probably influence us more than we realize. 

    • They color our thinking and our mood
    • They influence our behavior
    • They govern the way we look at events and individuals

    Some WIATs are silly and we know it

    Yet even rational, intelligent people still may accept them as truth. Most of us know at least one person who believes something like this:

    • Always leave a building through the same door you entered or it will bring bad luck
    • Never say something is going well or you'll jinx it
    • If you say you're happy it guarantees you soon will be unhappy

    WIATs can be contagious

    We spread them to our family and friends as easily as the flu virus.

    I think of the young woman friend who always removed every Kleenex pack, umbrella, etc., from her car before she'd leave it for maintenance. When I asked why, she answered, "Well, you know how mechanics are. They'll steal you blind every time."

    When did she get that idea? Here's her answer: "Oh, everybody knows it's true. It happens all the time."

    "Not to me," I said. "I've never had a problem, neither has anyone in our family."

    That stopped her for a moment and then she said, "Well, it happened to my dad. After that he never left his car or truck at a garage or loaned it out without first emptying it out. He warned me to be careful and so I am."

    Most of us can't identify the origins of our WIATs so easily.

    Be on the alert for notions that don't stand up to logic

    We do it all the time. Haven't you ever said something and then asked yourself, Now where did that come from?

    Think how often we say something like this:

    • I can't wear that color.
    • I could never do that. I don't have the brain/talent/strength for such things.
    • She would never want to be friends with me. 

    Sometimes we can trace our bogus thinking back to one of our parents and their thoughtless remarks.

    That's not surprising, because children usually accept without question whatever our moms or dads say. Those words, true or false, can dog us for life.

    Starting over

    Now's the time to clear out old wrong messages and replace them with truth. After all, aren't we wiser now?

    Here's a place to start:  

    1. Next time you put yourself down, stop and say out loud–or think–"That's not true!"
    2. Replace the faulty thinking. State what is true, based on what you know today and your own logic
    3. Repeat as often as needed

    Yes, I know it sounds too simple, but it works. Just stick with it until you've banished old thinking that's wrong.

    (It's true. I've lived these strategies long enough to see many of my WIATs fade away.)

    Revamping our wrong notions, once and for all

    If we realize we're stuck in old thinking that hurts us more than helps us, it's time to leave it behind. 

    Jesus came to set us free, but sometimes even Christians forget that whatever weighed us down in the past need burden us no more: 

    God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1 (ESV)

    Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he [or she] is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!                      –2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV)

    In Christ, WIATs lose their power over us. (That doesn't mean we'll never let wrong thinking take hold again.)

    From now on let's hold all our ideas up to the light of faith and right thinking and what makes sense now. Let's be free of old thinking!

    Learning along with you,

    Lenore

     

  • The day started off to be a good day. Sunshine. Warm temps. Blooming trees.  

    As I drove to my doctor's office a bit of anxiety caught in my throat, so my prayer held extra intensity. Lord, my times are in your hands. Please watch over me and our family. Keep me calm whatever he says and keep me safe, I pray. 

    Blog. Woman. shopping cart. 2.20Good lab test results sent me floating out of the office, my mind shouting Thank you, Lord! 

    Next I headed to a nearby big-box store, grabbed a cart and as usual, deposited my handbag in the kid-carrier. 

    I meandered through the store, then headed toward Checkout. That's when my heart stopped. My purse was not in the cart!

    You can imagine my thoughts

    My inner critic scolded: Idiot! You've heard the warnings from police. You know better.  

    I hightailed it to the Service Desk. Had anyone turned in a purse? No.

    I recited my tale to the nice young man from Security. He took off to do a store walk-through. Rather than stand and wait, I walked through the store, too, but found nothing.

    Back to the Service Desk to wait.  

    Security Guy returns. He found nothing. Calls his boss, who tells him to come view security camera footage.

    I wait some more, leaning against a counter.

    Security Guy finally returns and reports they saw nothing unusual or questionable on camera footage. 

    Well, it's just a purse, Ma'am. Yes, but . . .

    What did I have in my handbag?

    • Billfold
    • Driver's License 
    • I.D.
    • Bank debit cards
    • Credit cards
    • Cell phone
    • Auto key fob
    • Auto club membership card
    • House key
    • My business cards

    Put another way, my handbag held my "life." When I had it.

    As I mentally ticked off all the agencies I'd have to try to connect with my head started to pound. 

    What next?

    Store personnel were kind. Could they call someone for me? Sure, except now that I have a smartphone I never have to remember a phone number, so I don't.

    One daughter lives near me, but she kept her Midwest cell phone number through two moves and has no land line phone here. Forget looking up her number. 

    By then it was past noon and I hadn't eaten since early morning. No wonder I felt like I couldn't concentrate.  

    Thank God for a happy ending

    Just then Security Guy came around the corner, holding out a black purse. Was it mine?

    Yes! Where did he find it?

    Answer, "I walked the store again and looked closer. Something didn't look quite right, so I investigated. I found a black purse wedged behind a display. I don't know how your bag could have flipped out of the cart because the strap isn't long enough to catch on anything. Please, Ma'am, check to be sure you have everything."

    I did. Thank you, Lord!

    Later I checked the cart and found no cracks big enough for my bag to slide through. How did it get on the floor behind a display? I'll never know.

    The lesson to learn–for each of us

    How could I make sure this didn't happen again? Here's my plan. (Feel free to borrow anything useful.)

    1. Never, never, never deposit a handbag or billfold or cellphone in a shopping cart. 
    2. For women, only carry a cross-body bag or a waist bag–and don't lay it down. 
    3. Carry a list of essential phone numbers plus a bit of cash, separate from your bag.   
    4. OR carry cellphone, cash and key fob in a waist bag.

    One friend suggested putting the list in a plastic bag and sticking it behind one's bra. Or in a sock or a pocket. 

    Another suggested using a small travel money pouch. They're easily available, they're flat and inconspicuous and can be worn underneath clothing. 

    For me, the point is to always have access to what I need to stay in touch with loved ones, be able to drive and unlock my front door. 

    It's up to me to be prepared. If not me, then who? 

    Was this a time God stopped watching over me?

    I don't think so because He keeps His promises.

    The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.  -Psalm 121:18

    Besides, I didn't lose my "life" for good and I didn't have to call all those contact numbers to get licenses and cards reissued, nor have my locks changed. 

    I experienced a couple of trying hours, but my loss was temporary.

    Was God teaching me through all this? Probably. (Doesn't He always?)

    I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with my eye on you.  Psalm 32:8

    Did this experience have a point? Yes. Loud and unmistakable: I need to be watchful–not paranoid, just watchful.

    Make no mistake

    I was humbled that day and embarrassed, but I don't consider it a waste. If nothing else, I can pass it on as a caution to others.  People like you.  

    Perhaps you, too, have heard official warnings a million times and you didn't listen, either. 

    Maybe it's time.  

    Still learning, obviously, 

    Lenore