Category: Pain

  • Those of us who were old enough to understand will never forget  hearing the first reports of planes flying into the Twin Towers and watching heart-Blog. 9.11.Twin towers. 9.14stopping photos like these.

    The horror of it seemed beyond understanding.

    Over 3,000 Americans that beautiful September morning never made it home.   

    Each one had family and friends who loved them, who ached to hear their dear one tell them, "I'm okay."  

    But when their phones finally rang, that's not what the voice on the other end told them.

    Tragedy usually is like that–out of the blue 

    Life is a risky proposition. Being alive, feeling safe in our situation, is more fragile than we know.

    It lasts until . . .

    Until tragedy strikes close to home. A teenage son or daughter is killed in an accident. Our parent or spouse is diagnosed with Alzheimer's. A two-year old grandchild is diagnosed with leukemia.  

    Until something happens that shakes us to our core. Maybe we felt safe in our healthy living habits and patted ourselves on the back for resisting those "dastardly" foods we once loved, pushing ourselves to stay fit.

    Then came that symptom. Or that test. That calm, impersonal voice saying, "I'm sorry to tell you, but . . . . "

    That's when our inner self screamed, "No! Not me! Not mine!"

    Yet it was us. It was our loved one. And no amount of weeping or talking or consulting specialists could make it go away.

    At last we understood there was nothing to do but get through it and count on God's strength in Christ to carry us along.

    Then like Job, we endlessly replay our situation and cry out to God 

    I'm no theologian, but one thing I know. Job let it all hang out with God. He expressed his pain and frustration and his not-knowing-ness in stark language.

    Job had reason to wail. Not long before he "had it all" and lost everything, including his seven sons and three daughters.

    All of them (Job 1.)

    Then came Job's health, another casualty. Everyone in his life blamed God, but never once did Job, even in his worst moments, curse God.

    That's why God does not punish Job for his honest outpourings of pain.

    If you've ever studied the book of Job you know that God finally spoke to Job in chapters 38-41.  

    Chapter 42 tells "the rest of the story," how God indeed brought Job through his time of suffering and blessed him with more sons and daughters and long life.

    God can bring us through our hard times, too

    Like every other human being on earth, believers have times of suffering. Christians died on 9/11 and countless Christians suffer and die right now as refugees from persecution. Every one of us knows someone with something.

    Pain and disease come not from God's hand, but because we live in a world messed up by sin ever since Genesis.

    It's the human condition.

    But when tragedy and trials come, one thing we know: God is for us.

    If you're living your own "9/11" right now, take heart!

    Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.               –Psalm 55:22 (NIV)  

    Surely God is my help; the Lord is the one who sustains me.                                                           – Psalm 54:4 (NIV) 
    I can do all things through him who strengthens me.                                                             –Philippians 4:13 (NIV)
    My friend, whether you're in a good place right now or in a pit of pain, here's my prayer for you:
    I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being . . .                                                                                 –Ephesians3:16 (NIV)
    Lovingly,
    Lenore
     
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  • Maybe you never thought about Maya Angelou until now, after her recent death, when everyone's talking about her.

    Maybe you wonder what's the big deal?

    I sometimes disagreed with her views Blog. Maya Angelou. 6, but I admire how she came through a harsh childhood and grew into a calm, balanced woman of accomplishment.

    How did she do it?

    I think it traces back to her stable, loving grandmother, who spoke faith and hope into this hurting little girl. When Maya was three her dysfunctional father plunked her down to live with his mother-in-law, then four years later snatched her backto live with her mother.

    When Maya was eight, her mother's boyfriend raped her. She confided in her older brother, who told the family. The rapist was tried, convicted and jailed.

    For one day.

    Shortly thereafter, someone murdered him. Blaming herself for the man's death, Maya stopped talking . . . for five years.

    The two siblings were sent to live with Grandma, who provided a solid home, frequently reassuring them of Christ's love for them.

    How does one survive such experiences?

    We can learn a lot from Maya about overcoming pain. Her writings and interviews reveal what kept her from bitterness.

    • Faith in God:
      "I believed that there was a God because I was told it by my grandmother and later by other adults. But when I found that I knew not only that there was God but that I was a child of God, when I understood that, when I comprehended that, more than that, when I internalized that, ingested that, I became courageous."
    • Take the long view:
      "You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.” 
    • Choose to take a positive view of life:
      "You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.”

      "If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."

    • Forgive:  
      "You can't forgive without loving. And I don't mean sentimentality. I don't mean mush. I mean having enough courage to stand up and say, 'I forgive. I'm finished with it.'

    • Be authentic:
      "If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. Don't be surly at home, then go out in the street and start grinning 'Good morning' at total strangers.”
    • Be kind:
      "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
    • Recognize your impact on others:
      "Each of us, famous or infamous, is a role model for somebody, and if we aren't, we should behave as though we are — cheerful, kind, loving, courteous. Because you can be sure someone is watching and taking deliberate and diligent notes.”
    • Remember that life is a gift:
      Maya's prayer: "I want to thank you, Lord, for life and all that's in it. Thank you for the day and for the hour, and the minute.”
    This kind of transformation can't be accomplished on our own
     
    Maya's story reminded me of this verse, which reveals her secret.
    Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.  –2 Corinthians 5:17 (ESV)
    Maya Angelou was far from perfect, yet she was forgiven. In Christ, she was a new creation, freed from bitterness and hate.
     
    That's what enabled her to be able to say, "I forgive. I'm finished with it"–and mean it.
     
    You and I can have the same newness of mind and spirit. It's the gift that comes with believing in Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior (John 3:16-17.)
     
    Trusting, too,
    Lenore
     

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