Author: lbuth0511de28fc


  • Are you tired of the way your day-to-day life has been lately? 

    Here’s the good news: Getting unstuck appears much more complicated than it really is. Here’s the three-word formula: 

     Change. Your. Thoughts.

    I know, I know, that sounds too simple. I might not believe it, either, if I hadn’t lived it.

    It started when our children were young. Back then my mood would depend on circumstances. Maybe the skies were gray and it was raining. Or the baby wouldn’t stop wailing. Or my husband seemed anxious about goodness-knows-what. (No wonder I was cranky.)

    I apologized, of course, usually saying something like: “Sorry, Hon, I can’t help it. That’s just the way I’ve always been.”

    One day the truth hit me. That tiresome statement had become my excuse.

    I knew it was time for a turnaround. But how?

    Enter “The Worry Clinic”

    Our daily newspaper began running a syndicated column by the late Dr. George Crane three times a week. His style of conveying mental health tips immediately spoke to me, so I devoured every word, all while carrying on a running argument with him in my mind.

    Dr. Crane, a trained psychologist and a physician, described his advice as “old-fashioned horse sense,” a.k.a. common sense.

    He repeated this statement often:

    Act the way you want to feel and soon you’ll feel the way you act.

    The first time I read that it made no sense to me, but it opened my mind a crack. As time went on I began to see the truth of his words. It boiled down to:

    Our emotions flow out of what we think.

    Here’s how Dr. Crane explained the process: 

    You can change your thoughts as easily as you change stations on your radio or channels on your television sets. It involves deliberately switching your mind to another topic–and it can be learned. 

    All it takes is practice.

    That bumped me up against an uncomfortable truth. I kind of liked being able to excuse myself with, “I can’t help it. That’s who I am.”

    What shocked me more was to see that my moods rubbed off on our four young daughters. They had become star copycats of their mournful mom.  

    And my sweet husband, loving us, lived patiently with all five of us. 

    I resolved to change

    Dr. Crane primed readers not to expect an overnight transformation. Just as the captain of an ocean liner cannot turn the huge ship 180 degrees all at once, neither should we expect to do a 180 all at once. 

    The only way to do it was to deliberately master one degree at a time and then repeat that maneuver 180 times.

    Would it take awhile? Yes. Would it be worth it? Yes!

    Always before, I prayed for God to change me, then waited for change to happen. Now I understood I also needed to act in faith.

    That is, I needed to pray and trust, but also behave as if God already answered my prayer and changed me. As time went on these actions began to feel “natural.”

    Over time these small, incremental moves paid off. Our home became a happier place.

    For all six of us.

    Branching out 

    As a Christian it reassured me to read this remark of Dr. Crane, who was an M.D. and also a doctor of psychology and psychiatry:  

    “I gleaned more practical psychology and psychiatry from the Bible than from all other books!”

    By now I wanted to learn more and read more, but I didn’t want to lose my way. I needed a solid understanding of what the Bible says so I could evaluate what I read or saw in the media. I became more serious about reading the Bible and scribbled notes and underlined verses that spoke to me.

    In those pre-Internet days I dug into the shelves of our public library and frequently brought home stacks of books on personal growth, marriage and parenting. When something hit home I wrote it down. Older books, newer books, it didn’t matter. I devised my own criteria.

    –Did the principles in this book conflict with what I believed as a Christian or with my personal values? (If so I set it aside.)

    –Did the author sound in touch with real people or rely on jargon?

    I picked up bits of knowledge and wise advice from a host of good, qualified authors and counselors. Each one helped me grow.

    After years of reading and living, here’s what I know is true

    1. The circumstances of our lives do not determine our mindset. What matters most happens between our ears.
    2. We can manage our emotions because they flow out of what we feed our minds, just as Dr. Crane said. 
    3. Sound thinking is not enough. We also must invest our time and our will to make the changes we need.
    4. It’s not uncommon to have the “want to,” but think we’re not making progress in changing our habits. If trying to change is a continuing struggle it’s time to talk to your pastor or a trustworthy professional counselor.

    Whatever it takes, every bit of progress we make is still a win.

    Staying on track for the long haul 

    It is a daunting task to set out to change oneself from the inside out and it takes time to change old patterns of thinking. What helped me most was reminding myself often  that my best Friend, Jesus Christ, never left me to struggle on my own.

    Here are some of the Bible verses that spoke to my heart–and still do: 

    I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.     Philippians 4:13

    For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.   2 Timothy 1:7

    You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you.   Isaiah 26:3 

    It sounds too simple, but it’s true: You can change how you feel about your life by watching where you park your mind.  

    Lenore

     

     

  • Do you ever feel like you’ve had it and want out?

    I’m guessing we all feel that way at times, if only for a moment. Or a day. Times we feel a bit, shall we say, wimpy.

    Blog. Never  never  never give up.3.25That’s when I often turn to this Winston Churchill quote that hangs above my desk. It came with a blurb that explained the Prime Minister spoke those words in a speech he gave during October, 1941. The United Kingdom already had entered World War II, while the United States formally joined the War effort in December, 1941.

    I once knew a British war bride who lived in that harrowing time. She told how as a young woman she spent her days doing secretarial work in downtown London. Every night she and thousands of other Londoners crowded into the tunnels of the Tube (the Underground) and tried to sleep in the dank cold while Hitler’s Luftwaffe bombers rained bombs overhead.

    Each morning my friend and the others would drag themselves up and out, blinking in the daylight. They picked their way around and through piles of rubble and suspicious-looking debris to get to their work. Churchill’s slogan became their battle cry.

    When anyone seemed dejected and hopeless, they would call out–or mutter, “Never, never, never give up! Remember?”

    Hitler had one goal: to break the spirit of Great Britain and conquer 

    Churchill had a far different aim, to keep the citizenry united in their determination to survive whatever the Nazis hurled at them. Throughout World War II he frequently broadcast pep talks and status reports, often over short wave. Old and young strained to hear.

    Churchill had a way with words and his Nation clung to them for hope.

    No wonder he so often was credited with keeping up the morale and determination of the British nation.

    His words hang above my desk for a reason

    Sometimes I need that reminder, too, and his words prod me to keep on writing. If that surprises you it’s probably because movies, TV and novels usually depict the carefree, romantic life of a writer.

    Sorry to burst your bubble, but that’s fiction for most.

    Every writer I know tells a similar tale. First we brainstorm for ideas. Then we struggle for words that do more than lie there limp as a shoelace out of its shoe. Next we mentally try on points to make and practical take-aways we hope will fit possible readers.

    We stare off into space a lot, too, wondering whether our words will ever connect, ever touch hearts.

    You see, sometimes (often) I wonder what else could there be to say, or who might read what I write, much less remember any of it.

    Times like that Churchill’s quote reminds me to just get going and write something.

    Down days come along now and then, for every one of us

    We all prefer the bright and sunny days, don’t we? Most of us know what it feels like to have times we barely manage to “gut it out” and pray we can make it through.

    Winston Churchill’s parents may have felt that way as young Winston got expelled from more than one school. Too uncooperative. Too rebellious. Too independent–you get the picture. Somehow he made it through school. Perhaps his “Never give up” motto stemmed from his own years of struggle.

    Who could have predicted that many of the qualities that kept Winston in trouble as a youngster were exactly what he needed as a leader during World War II? I think there’s a message here for you and me:

    We cannot know now what our lives will be like in the future, or how all along God is equipping us with the qualities and learning we will need then.

    Words I treasure even more than Churchill’s 

    His words, as great as they are, indicate the courage to keep going has to come from within myself. Just between you and me, I’m not that strong.

    I do know where to find courage and comfort and peace when I’m troubled. Too often I try to work it out on my own first. It’s so much better to first talk it over with God (pray) and find the Bible verses that speak to my heart. The Bible is full of them!

    Here are a couple of the verses I treasure.

    [God says] Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”    –Joshua 1:9

    I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.   –Psalm 34:4

    We can talk to God about our fears and inadequacies, our innermost feelings any time of the day or night. He never slumbers or sleeps, remember? Any time is the right time to lay out our cares before Him.

    One truth I learned from living: When life challenges us to our limits, no matter how weak we feel, He enables us to “never, never, never give up”

    Dear friend, I pray you would know the truth of this and the joy of this for yourself.

    Lenore

  • If we grew up with a father who was present we were blessed  

    Nobody is perfect, but if he was there, we felt safe because whatever dangers might lurk in the shadows, we knew Daddy would protect us.

    Blog. Father. Daughter. 6.14

    When he held our hand we would go with him wherever he might lead, no questions asked.

    Jump off a roof? Sure.

    Walk into a raging ocean? Absolutely. Daddy wouldn’t let anything harm us.

    We thought he could do anything and answer any question we might ask.

    Why, Daddy must be the smartest man in the whole wide world!

    And then we grew up

    Sometime during our teenage years we realized Daddy didn’t know everything. He wasn’t cool. What’s more, he seemed determined to spoil our fun with all his rules. 

    Over time we met new people and, as the cliché puts it, we “expanded our horizons.”

    As we learned and grew we decided now we knew How Things Ought to Be.

    This left us less impressed with Dear Old Dad. He was so out of it. 

    Comes the enlightenment

    Eventually we became parents ourselves and suddenly we were the one(s) in charge. Whether our child (children) lived or died depended on us. Only then did we understand what every parent comes to know:

    The only time any of us knows everything about rearing children is before we have any.

    What’s more, parenting turned out to be way harder than we ever imagined.

    We ached to be perfect parents, but life kept getting in the way. We wanted to be bright and cheery and understanding at all times, but we didn’t even come close. Sometimes we even yelled at our beautiful, innocent darlings.

    Slowly we grasped the inescapable truth: We flesh-and-blood dads and moms do not have it in us to be perfect.

    Neither did our fathers. (Or mothers.)

    We couldn’t avoid the only logical conclusion: Most of them did the best they could with what they knew at the time.  

    Don’t–or didn’t–we all do the same? 

    If not before, now’s the time to be as compassionate and objective with our own fathers as we are with everyone else’s

    Only then will we see the blessing in what seemed so ordinary.  

    • Daddy was there. That made us feel secure because we knew we could count on him. Even if he couldn’t be present physically, we knew he was with us in his spirit and his heart.
    • We knew he loved us. We could see it in his smiles, even if he never uttered those three little words.
    • He loved our mom more than us–and we knew it. As Theodore Hesburgh said, “The most important thing a father can do for his children is love their mother.”
    • Dad wasn’t perfect, but he tried. Somehow we understood he did the best he knew how and gave us what he could.
    • If our father believed in Jesus and tried to live out the Christian faith he set a solid example for us. Even when we took it for granted. Even when we didn’t appreciate it.

    If your dad’s still breathing, tell him what he longs to hear  

    Tell him you love him now even more than when you were a child because you better understand what it cost him to be your father.

    Replay a few happy memories with him and watch his face light up. Listen to the new lilt in his voice.  

    Let him know it matters that he lived. Now, while he can hear it. 

    If you’ve had “issues” with your dad, there is no better time to set aside who’s “right” and who’s “wrong.” Let it go and forgive mistakes of the past.  

    Lay your unrest at the cross and be amazed how much lighter you feel.

    It may seem a small thing, but …

    As long as your father lives, you will always be Daddy’s “little girl” or “little boy.”

    This sounds like a cliché but take it from me, you’ll miss how that makes you feel.

    Whatever your father’s age, inside he’s the same Daddy who lightly placed you on his strong shoulders and made you feel like the luckiest kid around.

    Family love doesn’t always match our romanticized images, but it is love, just the same.

    If you still can, speak your love. Let your love be a gift not reserved for just one day of the year. Give it freely and taste the reward of a heart at peace.

    Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.                                       -1 Peter 4:8  NIV

    Praying you find JOY in your day-to-day,

    Lenore 

  • Does your heart start pounding when you watch or listen to the news?

    Many of us know that feeling, because it’s obvious that emotions run high on all sides. Lots of speculation–and fear.

    That makes it a good time to remind ourselves that our good old USA has been in turmoil before and this probably won’t be the last time that’s true. Whatever our current crises may be, this time likely will end up being another variation on an earlier period in U.S. history.

    If you doubt that, just read this editorial from Harper’s Magazine. It appeared in their October 10, 1847, edition, 175 years ago.

    (Please note at the time this was written it was socially and politically acceptable to use the term “man” to refer to all of humankind.)

    It is a gloomy moment in history. Not in the lifetime of any man has there been so much grave and deep apprehension; never has the future seemed so dark and incalculable.

    In France the political cauldron seethes and bubbles with uncertainty.

    England and the British Empire are being sorely tried and exhausted in a social and economic struggle, with turmoil at home and uprising on her teeming millions in her far-flung Empire.

    The United States is beset with racial, industrial and commercial chaos, drifting we know not where.

    Russia hangs like a storm cloud on the horizon of Europe–dark, menacing and foreboding.

    It is a solemn moment, and no man can feel indifference, which happily, no man pretends to feel in the issue of events.

    Of our own troubles no man can see the end. …

    What if we took that essay as encouragement instead of gloom?

    History–all of it–is loaded with missteps and mistakes, repeated again and again. Yet the sun keeps rising and setting on schedule and so does the moon. God set it up that way.

    Here are a few quotes and Scripture verses I pray would be heart-lifters for you as they are for me.

    The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.  –Franklin D. Roosevelt

    [Jesus said] “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.”

    Cast all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.  –1 Peter 5:7

    Courage is fear that has said its prayers.  –Dorothy Bernard

    May you find JOY in your day-to-day,

    Lenore

  • Have you ever sunk into feeling sorry for yourself?

    I confess to being, um, a little bit familiar with that unfortunate state of mind.

    Blog. Sad woman. 2013

    Like the time my husband got transferred in his work. He had studied and worked hard, hoping a move up would come through–and it did. He couldn't stop smiling. 

    I was happy for him, truly I was, but I couldn't quite share his exhilaration. I grieved inwardly about leaving our friends and the community I loved.  

    My sweet husband?  "Yes, but Honey, you know I can start right in and you read the contract. We'll be okay." 

    Logic told me he was right, but logic didn't change my heart. Yet I absolutely knew God arranged this position for my husband, so …

    I kept reminding myself surely He would have something good waiting for me, too.

    But what? Where?

    Once the moving truck unloaded our stuff in our new home, well, you know the routine. 

    Right away my husband had a "place" in our new community. He packed his days with appointments and meeting new people. I kept busy unpacking boxes and finding a place for this and for that. At last it felt more like our home, at least inside our four walls.

    Every day I pored over the local newspaper, trying to get a fix on the place we were living. One day I noticed a small listing for a community non-denominational women's Bible study. What did I have to lose?

    The next day I grabbed my Bible and drove to the host church. To my surprise and delight, parked cars stretched for blocks in all directions.

    Near the closing time all our small groups gathered in the auditorium so the teaching leader could expound on our assigned lesson from the Bible book of Exodus. She vividly recounted the story of God freeing the Israelites from captivity in Egypt.

    That day the familiar story from Sunday School sounded brand-new to my heart. 

    The marvel of God's power 

    You may remember how God set the children of Israel free from slavery in Egypt. Soldiers in chariots came after them all the way to the Red Sea, but before they got there, God parted the waters so His people could walk on dry land across the seabed.

    Once the Israelites were safely across, God released the waters. The pursuing Egyptians, along with their horses and chariots, were lost.

    Now God's people were free, but all they saw around them was dry desert and wilderness, but God did not abandon His people. He provided Manna every morning and flocks of quail every twilight, plus pure water.  

    And yet the people grumbled.

    Exodus 16 tells us they looked back fondly to Egypt–and slavery–because they liked the food better.

    The truth that hit home

    In her talk our study leader kept looking around the room to be sure we all felt included. Then came her concluding applications. It seemed she looked right at me when she asked, "Are you wandering around in a dry, dusty wilderness of your own making?"

    I gulped. Then she asked, "Are you murmuring against God because the specifications of your life are not exactly as you would choose?"

    She couldn't have known, but her words described exactly how I felt about our new life, the one God had given us. 

    That day nothing changed, but everything changed. 

    Once I took my eyes off Poor Pitiful Me and looked for the good in our new situation I found quite a lot.

    My husband said he got his wife back–and here I thought he hadn't noticed.

    I've never forgotten that lesson: Look for the good, whatever the situation

    Recently I ran across an old prayer I've loved for years, ever since I happened on it in a souvenir shop.

    The original was found folded and tattered in the pocket of an unknown Confederate soldier, a casualty in the U.S. Civil War, 1865:

    I asked God for strength, that I might achieve;

        I was made weak, that I might learn humbly to obey.

    I asked for health, that I might do greater things;

        I was given infirmity, that I might do better things.

    I asked for riches, that I might be happy;

        I was given poverty, that I might be wise.

    I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men;

        I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God.

    I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life;

        I was given life, that I might enjoy all things.

    I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I hoped for.

        I am among all men most richly blessed.

    Those simple, eloquent words still touch my heart every time I read them because they remind me of all the times I, too, got "nothing that I asked for, but everything I hoped for."

    I wish I could say I never lost sight of that truth, but one thing I know for sure. When I focus on the Giver's goodness it's much easier to keep a sunny mood. 

    My friend, I pray that you find many blessings in each day!

    Lenore

  • Talking heads keep telling us of falling birth rates.

    They often state that today's couples want "experiences" instead of–or before–having children.  

    Ask any mom or dad and they'll tell you parenting brings one experience after the other. All day. Every day. Right? 

    Blog. Boy. Young. 5.2025It offers lots of laughs, too, if we get our egos out of the way. Check it out for yourself by reading these real answers to real questions given to a group of second-graders. (Sorry, I don't know when or where.)

    Question 1. Why do we have mothers?

      1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
      2. Mostly to clean the house.
      3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

    Question 2. How did God make mothers?

       
        1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
        2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
        3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

    Question 3. What ingredients are mothers made of?
     
        1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
        2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

    Question 4. Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
     
        1. We're related.
        2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

    Question 5. What kind of a little girl was your mom?
     
        1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
        2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
        3. They say she used to be nice.

    Question 6. What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?

        1. His last name.
        2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
        3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

    Question 7. Why did your mom marry your dad?

        1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.
        2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
        3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

    Question 8. Who's the boss at your house?

        1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
        2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
        3. I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

    Question 9. What's the difference between moms and dads?

        1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
        2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
        3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause
    that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.
        4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

    Question 10. What does your mom do in her spare time?

        1. Mothers don't do spare time.
        2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

    Question 11. What would it take to make your mom perfect?

        1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
        2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

    Question 12. If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?

        1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
        2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it not me.
        3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
     
    Do you feel better? Good, me too
     
    Laughter and smiles are good for us, as Proverbs 17:22 tells us, here from The Message: A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person's strength.
     
    What's more, children absorb their mom's attitude just as a sponge soaks up water, especially in their early years. Happy mama, happy kids.
     
    (It works that way with the rest of the family, too, whatever their ages.)
     
    Wishing you JOY–in your day-to-day and especially on Mother's Day!
     
    With love,
    Lenore
     

  • Most of us have said it at some time: “He/she makes me so mad!” 

    We’re not hotheads, you and I, but you know how it goes. “Some people” just won’t cooperate.

    Won’t face the truth.

    Won’t see it our way.

    What then? It can feel good to spew forth a stream of complaints and reasons why we are right. We tell ourselves we’re vindicated and pat ourselves on the back for being strong.

    That lasts a few delicious moments. 

    But . . .  

    Angry, careless words can be costly, especially in a marriage. They quickly poison the atmosphere between husband and wife. 

    Divide families.

    End friendships.

    Put up walls between people that can stay in place for generations. 

    So what do we do?

    This is the time to swallow hard and take our own advice, like the logic we repeat to our children and younger friends. Who hasn’t said something like:  “Nobody else makes you mad. You choose it. Any time you get mad, she (or he) wins.”

    That’s true, but it’s hard to stay unruffled when someone–of any age–is pushing our buttons. Some of us learned this truth the hard way and know when we “lose it,” we shrink our personal power.  

    Every healthy relationship thrives on give-and-take and mutual respect, which allows each one to hang onto their self-esteem. 

    Verbal attacks usually feel satisfying in the moment–and may even be well-justified, but in the end, they tarnish and tear down.

    Well, nobody’s perfect

    Yes, but any of us can up our score if we’re willing to seek help. Professional counselors are available in every community, but often what makes us hesitate is wondering whom we can trust.  

    Talk to your pastor first. They’re good listeners and many are good counselors. They also can offer names of trusted professional counselors. That’s preferable to simply picking a name from Internet listings and profiles.

    Always, the wisdom of Scripture provides a solid base. Take Proverbs 15:1, for example:

    A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. 

    For years I considered that to be a bit wimpy, a lot like “put up and shut up.” 

    I know now that responding with gentleness to another person’s anger takes a lot of inner strength, the exact opposite of weakness. 

    We live in the world and people notice what we do and say

    Living out that principle should be easiest with people we know best and love most, but sometimes home is where we most often “get on each other’s nerves”.

    Yet home is the proving ground and it determines whether we’re genuine. Our words need to match our deeds or our words don’t ring true. Even when we’re angry we are to treat others with respect. 

    Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.    1 John 3:18

    How do we hang onto our power? Jesus told his followers how in Luke 6:31:  

    “And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.”   

    The Better Way

    Don’t get me wrong. We’re human beings, after all, which ensures we will stumble and slip even in a strong friendship or a happy marriage. Despite our good intentions, sometimes we’ll still feel that urge to let ‘er rip.  

    Always, the best strategy is to: 

    • Remind ourselves of the other person’s good qualities
    • Remember the good times and talk about them
    • Pray for healing

    Like a broken bone that mends, your relationship can come through stronger than before.     

    Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4:32

    Differences can be a plus  

    Perhaps a wife and husband come to realize they are opposites. Then what?  

    First, last and always, talk things through, even though it’s hard. Some counselors advise couples to hold hands and look each other in the eye while you hash it out. Be honest, but be kind. No name-calling.  

    Would you be surprised to know that over time, many couples find that each one comes to appreciate qualities in the other that once irritated them? 

    Put another way, two “opposites” can complement each other. As one wise advisor worded it, the two fill in each other’s missing places. Together such a couple becomes “more” than either spouse could be on their own.

    Be patient, remembering this can’t be an overnight fix. Give it time as you learn to know each other–and yourself–better and trust each other more.

    Power comes from knowing who we are and having ourselves under control

    That flies contrary to today’s opinions, doesn’t it? Think about those you know whom you consider “powerful”. Aren’t those qualities on display?

    When that’s our customary temperament and behavior we can be described as “self-possessed”. Merriam-Webster.com defines that term this way:  control of one’s emotions or reactions especially when under stress”

    That sums it up, don’t you think? 

    For me as a Christian, the wisest words on how to live–in every situation–always can be found in what Jesus said in Matthew 7:12 and again in Luke 6:31:

    “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

    Wishing you JOY in your day-to-day,

    Lenore

     

  • Maybe you think that's impossible in your situation. 

    But what if it were true? Would you trade how you feel about your life now for deep-down, unshakable peace, no matter what comes? 

    I write this as we near the end of what Christians call the Lenten season and Blog. Cross. 4.17nearing  Easter.                

    You may be thinking, So what? That means nothing to me except chocolate eggs and bunnies. Silliness, really. 

    Let's set that aside and concentrate on why Christians have celebrated Easter for centuries.

    Not for treats but to remember the reason for it all.

    Let's start with a brief recap 

    The first pages of the Bible recount how God created what we call the natural world out of nothing. (Genesis 1)

    Genesis 2 tells about God creating Adam and Eve, the first two human beings. They lived in a beautiful garden and were completely at ease with their Heavenly Father. We would say, they had it all.

    God laid down only one condition: Do not touch or eat the fruit of this one tree in the middle of the garden or you will die. 

    Then came the Devil, who spoke through the serpent. He planted doubt. (Doesn't he always?) Eve tasted the fruit and found it good, so she gave some to Adam and he, too, turned away from the Father who loved them.  (Genesis 3)

    Their disobedience changed everything–for them and their descendants–that's us–even to this day.

    What does this have to do with me?

    We all know how often we fail to live up to even our own standards. (Remember those New Year's resolutions?)

    What about after we die? Most people say they want to live a good life and many think if they "do the right thing" enough of their life they will make it into Heaven.

    Yet our best efforts fall short because God's desire is that we be holy, because he is holy (Leviticus 19:2.) That means to be utterly good, in thought, word and deed, 24 hours a day throughout our lifetimes. Anything else is called "sin."

    You and I know we couldn't achieve that, no matter how hard we tried.  

    Even so, God never stopped loving. That's what Christmas is all about. The human baby born to Mary in Bethlehem, was the Son of God, and Joseph was to be his human father. (Luke, chapters 1-2) 

    That Baby was human, born to a human mother, but he was also God. (Luke 1:35) 

    So why did he die on a cross?

    Let's get this straight first: Jesus was not overwhelmed and captured by those soldiers in the Garden of Gethsemane. He went with them willingly, all while knowing what would follow.

    This God-man came to earth to set things right between us human beings and God. Jesus, who never sinned, allowed Himself to be nailed to the cross. For you, for me. It was all part of God's plan.

    God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God. 2 Corinthians 5:21

    In [Christ] we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace.                 Ephesians 1:7

    Jesus died on a cross, yes, but there is more to it 

    If you haven't known it before, you can read the whole story in the Gospel of John, chapters 19-21.

    Yes, Jesus died to pay the price for all our sins, past, present and future.

    But … he rose again!

    After three days in the tomb he reappeared to his followers many times. He interacted and talked with them and ate regular food with them.

    Jesus even invited Thomas to touch his wounds because Thomas couldn't believe what his friends were saying.  

    No wonder his followers were overjoyed

    You and I can share in that joy. Because Jesus lives eternally, every person who trusts and believes in him as their Lord and Savior also has eternal life.

    For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life.                                                                                       John 3:16

    "Whoever" includes all who believe. Period.

    That's why Christians celebrate Easter

    It's all about love. Love that kept Jesus there on the cross. Love that never fails or walks away when we're hurting. Love that brings us joy, even in our lowest times.

    This gift is available to every one of us, ours for the taking and the trusting. Will we accept it and choose to walk with the One who loves us this much? 

    I'm praying for you, dear invisible friends,

    Lenore

     

  • You may be thinking that sounds great but you've never held an important job or been celebrated for anything.  

    Blog. Older woman. Smiling. 9.20How could that be true? Meet my long-ago friend Alice. This tiny, smiling woman–barely 5 feet tall and walking with a cane–saw herself as "nothing special." 

    Yet when Alice died, six employees from the local Post Office attended her memorial–in uniform. One stood up to tell how much they all would miss their friend.

    "What we get mostly is people complaining about this or that. But when sweet Alice breezed in, we all smiled. Every week or two she brought us a heaping platter of her delicious homemade cookies.

    "I asked her once why she did it and she said, 'Well, I love to bake up my old recipes and I end up with a lot. So I just share the extras. Besides, you people bring me my mail every day, in every kind of weather. This is just me saying, Thanks and God bless you, all of you!'

    "She always called out a jaunty Hello to the people working behind the counter, too. I tell you, Alice brought sunshine in with her and every one of us will miss her!"

    He blotted his eyes all the way back to his seat.   

    The small-town newspaper editor spoke next and told how he loved reading Alice's thoughtful letters.

    After him came the high school principal, "I keep an open file folder labeled 'Alice' just to hang on to her notes of encouragement to our teachers and to me. She had no special reason, usually. That was just Alice." 

    Next came her neighbor, sniffling and wiping her eyes. "Alice shared everything. Hugs of encouragement. Roses from her backyard, homemade pie sometimes and of course, her famous chocolate walnut cookies. 

    Then a young man told how Alice always seemed to sense when he needed to talk and best of all, she always made time to listen.

    A time or two her encouragement and faith were the only things that kept him in school.

    Your life matters more than you can guess

    I knew Alice and I promise you she wouldn't have taken cookies to her local Post Office just so some employee would come to her memorial and speak well of her.

    Alice was just being Alice and living out what she read and studied in the Bible. She often told our small Bible study group how thankful she was for life.  

    She counted blessings, big and "small," as in, "God has blessed me so bountifully! I thank him every day that I can still walk around and my eyes still let me see the beauty in this world God created."

    Alice reminded us nearly every week to lift up people around us. "God created every human being to be one-of-a-kind, so let's be encouragers. Nobody has an easy life."   

    Then she would say, "Every small kindness leaves its mark."  

    None of us are "ordinary"

    We may suppose we live insignificant lives. Not so!

    For instance, if you're a mom or dad, as you every day interact with your children, you influence how they look at life.

    They will see the world through your eyes long before they form an opinion of their own. You write the script for how they think of God, how they view authority and for how they love–or don't know how to love.

    By the way, we parents do not lose our influence just because our children have reached adulthood. Yes, our grown children live their own lives, but most times, they (perhaps secretly) care what we think.

    More importantly, they still watch to see whether we live out what we tell them is important. 

    Whether they see us as friend or critic is up to us, more than to them.

    Each of us is like a stone tossed into a lake

    Every one of us leaves ripples that travel far beyond ourselves.

    Never discount your importance in the lives of the people around you. You matter in ways you may never know. Just as water can wear away stone, so our small deeds, over and over, carry a lasting effect.

    If we tuck that point-of-view in the back of our minds we'll become more aware. More alert for ways we can touch and encourage others along the way.

    Alice would say, "Keep your eyes on Jesus. He's the One who keeps us going and shows us how to live here in our little corner of the world. If we just follow Him we'll know what to do."  

    "Do to others as you would have them do to you."  Luke 6:31

    Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.   1 Thessalonians 5:11

    That covers it, don't you think?

    May you have JOY in your day-to-day!

    Lenore

  • We all know someone who never seems to rate much attention, even though they deserve it.  

    I love the true story I heard about a woman like that, let's call her Martha. She lived in a tiny Blog. Older woman. 1.19town in the middle of logging country and belonged to a very small church. 

    The church might be small but everyone pitched in to do whatever needed doing. Martha, well, not so much. 

    She always gave the same reason why she never taught Sunday School or Bible class or sang in the small choir: "When the good Lord was passing out gifts, he passed right over me. You don't want me to try teaching, believe me. And I can't carry a tune, just ask anyone who ever sat next to me in church.

    "Guess I'm a follower, not a leader and I like it that way."  

    Still, Martha never missed a worship service or a church event and at potlucks, people gobbled up her tasty dishes. Meanwhile, she would be out in the kitchen, washing dishes and wiping counters and sweeping the floor.   

    That's probably why people knew her face, but couldn't remember her name.

    When Martha moved away hardly anyone noticed

    What they did notice a couple of weeks after she left was that problems kept cropping up. The Sunday "coffee guy" said, "This place is falling apart! I came to put the coffee on, like I always do, and there's no coffee to put in the coffeemaker. Whose job is it to buy the extra supplies?" 

    Then one of the women blustered in and said, "I can't find any toilet paper or paper towels in the storage cabinet! This never happened before. Now what am I supposed to do?"

    The resident wise guy happily added his two cents worth: "And whoever is supposed to sweep the sidewalks is falling down on the job! What's going on around here?"

    You're way ahead of me, aren't you?

    The common denominator was Martha, the I-have-no-gifts-or-talents lady. Before, she always took care of keeping supplies on hand. Quietly, on her own.

    She lived close to the church so she could come and go while the pastor kept office hours. Hardly anyone ever noticed her. When the pastor at last heard the complaints he made it known how this one unassuming woman with the gentle smile faithfully ministered to everyone else.

    And he added, she didn't do it for applause, but out of love.

    Perhaps you're a little–or a lot–like Martha

    You go around blessing the people around you and never look for praise.

    Maybe you think you have no "place"–or if you do, it's way at the bottom of the pecking order 

    However we spend our days, here's a short poem we each can take to heart;  

    YOUR  PLACE

    Is your place a small place?

    Tend it with care!–

    He set you there.

    Is your place a large place?

    Guard it with care!

    He set you there.

    Whate'er your place, it is

    Not yours alone, but His

    Who set you there.

    –John Oxenham            

    Whatever we do, wherever we are in life, it's not by chance

    We all feel like "little people" from time to time. That doesn't matter unless we brood over it and think we should receive more recognition. What matters is what our Lord thinks of us because He knows our hearts and knows our motives.

    Here's encouragement to hang onto in every situation:

    For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

    Ephesians 2:10

    "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."

    Jeremiah 29:11-12

    Wishing you JOY in your day-to-day!

    Lenore