Category: Living fully

If you’re weary of “nothing happening” days and feeling frustrated for change, stop and rethink.

Think back to the time(s) a crisis of some sort caused you to wish you could go back a day. Or a week. Or a year. Back to before.

Before those medical tests.

Before that pink slip.

Before that stroke.

Before the “whatever” that seemed to come out of nowhere and turn your life upside down.

Next comes the nagging procession of “what ifs” and “if onlys”.

Do struggles ever have a purpose?

Here’s an old tale that may give us a bit of an answer:

One day a youngster burst into his home with excitement and rushed to show his mother his latest discovery. “What’s this, Mom?”

“That’s called a cocoon, Son. You might say it’s a butterfly-in-the-making. There’s a butterfly growing inside the shell, which protects it until the butterfly inside is ready to come out.”

One day, the boy noticed the cocoon starting to move. He watched and waited, trying his best to be patient. After awhile he said to himself, “That poor little butterfly needs help!”

So he found a pair of scissors and carefully cut away the hard brown shell. Then he cried, “Fly! Fly!” But the sorry-looking creature never did.

He ran to his mom and said, “Come look! I tried to make it easier for the butterfly to get out, but it just won’t fly. Why not?”

Mom hugged him and said, “You tried to help, Honey, but God created the butterfly so that when it’s just about ready to come out, it kicks and it pushes against the cocoon’s walls, over and over.

“It can take a long time to break through the shell, but the butterfly needs every kick and every push to get strong. Strong enough to break free of the shell so it can fly.”

What about you and me?

What if our down days, our boring days, and even our struggles actually help us grow strong–and strengthen our faith in God, too?

A Bible verse that has come to mean a lot to me is Ecclesiastes 7:14:

When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider: God has made the one as well as the other.

Still, life can be hard. At first we may think ourselves able to handle a challenge with no problem. Before long we find out we’re not strong enough on our own. As never before, we turn to prayer.

I once heard a Bible teacher say, “No experience is ever wasted in the life of a Christian” and I thought, well, that’s nice.

By now I’ve lived long enough to understand that trials along the way do help develop my inner strength and my faith.

Living it out

Here’s how I understand it. If we’re still breathing and we have a pulse, God has something for us to do. Think about these Bible verses, for example:

For it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure. Philippians 2:13

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10

As your days, so shall your strength be. Deuteronomy 33:25

Whatever comes, we’re not on our own

By now I’ve learned to pray I will appreciate each day while I am living it.

Years ago I tacked these lines by Mary Jean Iron to my bulletin board. Maybe they will speak to your heart as they do to mine.

Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are …

Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect Tomorrow.

One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in my pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return.

May those simple words remind us to live each day as if it were God’s precious gift to us. Because it is.

(Even the days we label boring.)

Wishing you peace and JOY in every day,

Lenore

Could Feeling Bored Indicate We Are Blessed?

February 23, 2026
I know, it sounds too simple, but then, most principles of life boil down to simple, don’t they?

It took me way too long to understand that sticking to these three attitudes toward life can eliminate much of what we call “stress”.

Here’s what I came up with for now.

1. Get real.

2. Get focused.

3. Get thankful.

Curious? Read on.

Get real. We ought not expect the people around us to be on our wave length. They’re individuals, remember?

So are the people we’re closest to. So it shouldn’t surprise us if they don’t immediately grasp the meaning of what we say to them. And vice versa. This explains why any two people so often talk past each other.

I well remember the first time I gave my husband one of those “poor little me” remarks, thinking my groom would understand and see my point. Instead, he replied, “Honey, you’re only disappointed because you expected me to do that and I didn’t. But you never asked or even hinted. How was I supposed to know what you wanted?”

Once I got over being annoyed I realized my practical guy was right. Like many women I value spontaneous gestures and like most men, he wasn’t wired that way.

A small bit of common sense reminds us that flowery gestures come cheap–and can be empty. A good marriage thrives on honesty, faithfulness and loving through whatever comes. So does any close relationship or friendship.

Getting real means steering clear of comparisons and if onlys, too. That’s harder to do in the face of social media and because we stare at screens so much of the time.

It’s time we engrave this on the hard drive of our minds:

Except for live interviews and action shots, everything we see on TV or on Facebook, Instagram, and the like has been carefully staged.

(Think about it. Would you post a photo or video depicting your family and yourself in the midst of a bad day?)

Nevertheless, distractions like TV shows and social media can be enticing traps. We look at what’s onscreen and then contemplate our “imperfect” lives and get depressed.

We get depressed because we forget that we see only what they want us to see.

2. Get focused

Whether we realize it or not, we constantly telegraph–and pick up–messages by what we focus on.

I saw that play out at lunchtime one day. At the next table a dad and his little girl, maybe four years old, were having lunch. Throughout their meal Daddy talked with his daughter and she talked back, with lots of smiles and giggles. He picked her up when they finished and she buried her face in his neck. He carried her out and both were grinning from ear to ear.

Tables around them held other couples and families, everyone engrossed in their smart phones or electronic gadgets and grabbing bites. Nobody smiled and nobody talked to anybody, at least not to any live person sitting at the same table. When they finished eating they simply got up and walked out, still focused on their electronic gadgets. I doubt I could have counted five smiles among that group.

The contrast pained my heart. The daddy and daughter deepened their relationship and enhanced their family’s strength and love. The others, the ones who hardly spoke to each other, satisfied their hunger and their curiosity of the moment. Nothing more.

I’ll not forget that day because it felt as if I were observing a case study in the ways people interact with others. Or lack of same.

That lunchtime drove home an important truth for me: What and whom we focus on plays a huge part in our moods and how we view our lives.

3. Get thankful

For some of us progress may be slow, but to simply be thankful can become a habit. I truly believe that.

I’ve been working for years to learn the art of tuning my awareness toward the good rather than getting hung up on what I perceive as life’s insufficiencies or annoyances. I don’t have it nailed yet, but I’ve made progress. I see the difference in my moods and outlook on life.

I know now how much it lifts my mood all day if I start by thanking God for what is and ask His strength and blessing for the day.

At bedtime I wrap up the day by thanking the Giver and naming the good, ending with a simple, “Thank you, Lord.” Then I commit to God’s loving care the people I’m concerned about and whatever troubles me. Most of the time that helps me drift off to sleep with a smile.

As always, the Bible shows us how:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6

Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8

That last verse from Philippians spells out the best and most stable places to park our thoughts.

Once we learn to fix our thoughts on what is real and what is right in our lives and in the people we love, living more happily naturally follows. Instead of scowling and complaining about what’s wrong with the world, we can fasten on God’s goodness in the midst of it all–and smile.

(Besides, they say smiling helps stave off wrinkles.)

Still learning,

Lenore
Three simple steps to living more happily

November 7, 2025
Some of us are stuck in yesterday

We still hear the critical voices of our parents or teachers or the taunts of childhood friends. In times of clear thinking we remind ourselves that’s pointless, but old hurts and doubts still surface and hang around.

Oh sure, we know no one had a perfect childhood. But here we are, still dragging around wrong messages from the past. Why is that?

How can we lighten that load or put it down for good?

Begin by recognizing painful words for what they are

This story is about our friend “Tim,” but it could just as well be about “Tina”.

Tim grew up with an alcoholic dad who delighted in bringing everyone else down. Especially his children. When the kids came home excited because they got good grades or because they had come out on top, Pops would laugh and ask, “Oh, getting the big head, are we?

Every. Single. Time.

The boy became the teenager became the adult. Everyone who knew him considered Tim a success story.

That is, everyone but Tim.

Whenever things went his way at work or his wife told him she was proud of him, Tim still heard his father’s voice taunting him with the same hurtful question.

He felt hopeless and asked himself, would he–could he–ever be free?

Then Tim and his buddy joined the men’s group from church

They quickly felt comfortable and liked the informal discussion of how the Bible still applies to living today. Then came a snack, plus lots of time to just talk–and really connect. Tim slowly felt himself relax.

One week their assignment was to do a self-assessment which they could share or not, no pressure.

They only had to think through one question:

Who am I now? Today?

Letting go of the past

As he thought about his life Tim saw how all his life he worked hard to prove himself–to his dad, he finally understood.

Now he had a good job and he got along well with his co-workers.

Best of all, he and his wife were strong together. The hard times they struggled through taught them they could rely on each other. I love her more today than when I married her. Thank you, Lord!

He thought of their family and smiled. They’re good kids, they’re healthy and they’re doing okay in school. I need to tell them a lot more often that I love them and I’m proud of them.

The question of the week no longer intimidated him.

When his eyes dropped to the Bible verse of the week, 2 Corinthians 12:9, God’s words to the Apostle Paul. Tim felt it could have been written just for him.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

Seeing clearly at last

Next time the men’s group gathered, Tim couldn’t wait to share the new understanding he gained of his father:

“For perhaps the first time, I saw my dad with clear eyes. Back then he was a walking disaster. Constantly putting all of us down made him feel better about his own messed-up life.

“Once I understood that, I could let it go. Now when I hear Dad’s critical voice in my head I answer it with today’s truth, which is that I like my life and what I’ve become. I know it’s God’s blessing and from now on I want to live out last week’s Bible verse:”

“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?”   Isaiah 43:18-19

Enduring truths

Long ago I found a quote which brought me up short. Way back in history, Epictetus, a Greek philosopher who lived from 55 A.D. until 135 A.D., summed it up this way:

“It’s not what happens to you but how you react to it that matters.”

These words can be a power statement that fits each of us, at any stage of life. Whether we realize it or not, we have within us the power to control how we think about what comes into our lives. Whether we’re troubled by painful memories from the past or by uneasiness over present reality, when we change our thinking, we can change our lives.

Still learning,

Lenore

Why Not Live Free?

July 29, 2025
Maybe you think that's impossible in your situation.

But what if it were true? Would you trade how you feel about your life now for deep-down, unshakable peace, no matter what comes?

I write this as we near the end of what Christians call the Lenten season and nearing Easter.

You may be thinking, So what? That means nothing to me except chocolate eggs and bunnies. Silliness, really.

Let's set that aside and concentrate on why Christians have celebrated Easter for centuries.

Not for treats but to remember the reason for it all.

Let's start with a brief recap

The first pages of the Bible recount how God created what we call the natural world out of nothing. (Genesis 1)

Genesis 2 tells about God creating Adam and Eve, the first two human beings. They lived in a beautiful garden and were completely at ease with their Heavenly Father. We would say, they had it all.

God laid down only one condition: Do not touch or eat the fruit of this one tree in the middle of the garden or you will die.

Then came the Devil, who spoke through the serpent. He planted doubt. (Doesn't he always?) Eve tasted the fruit and found it good, so she gave some to Adam and he, too, turned away from the Father who loved them. (Genesis 3)

Their disobedience changed everything–for them and their descendants–that's us–even to this day.

What does this have to do with me?

We all know how often we fail to live up to even our own standards. (Remember those New Year's resolutions?)

What about after we die? Most people say they want to live a good life and many think if they "do the right thing" enough of their life they will make it into Heaven.

Yet our best efforts fall short because God's desire is that we be holy, because he is holy (Leviticus 19:2.) That means to be utterly good, in thought, word and deed, 24 hours a day throughout our lifetimes. Anything else is called "sin."

You and I know we couldn't achieve that, no matter how hard we tried.

Even so, God never stopped loving. That's what Christmas is all about. The human baby born to Mary in Bethlehem, was the Son of God, and Joseph was to be his human father. (Luke, chapters 1-2)

That Baby was human, born to a human mother, but he was also God. (Luke 1:35)

So why did he die on a cross?

Let's get this straight first: Jesus was not overwhelmed and captured by those soldiers in the Garden of Gethsemane. He went with them willingly, all while knowing what would follow.

This God-man came to earth to set things right between us human beings and God. Jesus, who never sinned, allowed Himself to be nailed to the cross. For you, for me. It was all part of God's plan.

God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God. 2 Corinthians 5:21

In [Christ] we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace. Ephesians 1:7

Jesus died on a cross, yes, but there is more to it

If you haven't known it before, you can read the whole story in the Gospel of John, chapters 19-21.

Yes, Jesus died to pay the price for all our sins, past, present and future.

But … he rose again!

After three days in the tomb he reappeared to his followers many times. He interacted and talked with them and ate regular food with them.

Jesus even invited Thomas to touch his wounds because Thomas couldn't believe what his friends were saying.

No wonder his followers were overjoyed

You and I can share in that joy. Because Jesus lives eternally, every person who trusts and believes in him as their Lord and Savior also has eternal life.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life.                                                                                     John 3:16

"Whoever" includes all who believe. Period.

That's why Christians celebrate Easter

It's all about love. Love that kept Jesus there on the cross. Love that never fails or walks away when we're hurting. Love that brings us joy, even in our lowest times.

This gift is available to every one of us, ours for the taking and the trusting. Will we accept it and choose to walk with the One who loves us this much?

I'm praying for you, dear invisible friends,

Lenore

Are You Longing for More Life in Your Life?

April 18, 2025
Some people wish they lived in "simpler times." They picture themselves reclining on couches or sitting on cool wraparound porches, sipping cool lemonade.

It must have been idyllic, they tell themselves. But was it?

Maybe not. Years ago our family visited a museum where I picked up a small souvenir parchment, an exact copy of one pioneer mother's laundry instructions to her soon-to-be-married daughter.

Mama's Wash Receipt

1. Bild a fire in back yard to heet kettle of rain rater.

2. Set tubs so smoke won't blow in eyes if wind is pert.

3. Shave one hole cake of lie sope in bilin water.

4. Sort things. Make three piles. 1 pile white, 1 pile cullord, 1 pile work britches and rags.

5. Stir flour in cold water to smooth, then thin down with bilin water.

6. Rub dirty spots on board, scrub hard, then bile. Rub cullord, but don't bile–just rench and starch.

7. Take white things out of kettle with broom handle, then rench, blew and starch.

8. Spred tee towels on grass.

9. Hang old rags on the fence.

10. Pore rench water on flower bed.

11. Scrub porch with hot soapy water.

12. Turn tub upside down.

13. Go put on clean dress–smooth hair with side combs.

14. Brew cup of tea–set and rest and rock a spell and count yer blessings.

(Do you still want to swap your automatic washer and dryer for the "romance" of living long ago?)

Let's not stop with laundry

A friend sent this to me, assorted random facts from 1910:

♦ Average life expectancy for men: 48 years

♦ Old Glory featured only 45 stars

♦ Crossword puzzles, canned beer, and iced tea had not been invented

♦ Official Mother's Day or Father's Day? Not then

♦ The bra would not be patented until 1914

♦ Two out of every 10 adults couldn't read or write and only 6 percent of all Americans had graduated from high school

♦ The process to flash-freeze food was patented in 1924 by Clarence Birdseye

♦ Only 14 percent of all U.S. homes had a bathtub

♦ Penicillin not discovered until 1928

♦ Just 8 percent of homes had a telephone

♦ The first voice and music signals heard were transmitted over radio waves in December 1906

♦ The ballpoint pen invented in 1944

♦ There were only 8,000 cars and only 144 miles of paved roads in the USA

♦ The maximum speed limit in most places: 10 mph

♦ Tallest structure in the world: the Eiffel Tower

♦ Average US wage in 1910 only 22 cents per hour

♦ The average US worker earned between $200 and $400 per year

♦ The calculator invented in 1970

♦ More than 95% of all births took place at home

♦ 90 percent of all doctors had no college education

♦ Sugar cost about 4 cents per pound

♦ Eggs sold for about 14 cents a dozen

♦ Coffee was 15 cents a pound

♦ 18% percent of households had at least one full-time servant

♦ There were about 230 reported murders in the entire U.S.

♦ Most women washed their hair only once a month and used Borax or egg yolks for shampoo

♦ Underarm deodorant and toothpaste did not exist

♦ The five leading causes of death: 1. The flu, 2. Tuberculosis, 3. Diarrhea, 4. Heart disease, 5. Stroke

Obviously, there were no microwaves, no cell-phones, no internet, no social media.

One centenarian's opinion

Over four decades ago my grandmother, who at the time lived in an assisted-living facility, celebrated her 100th birthday. (She lived to be 101.) The local small-town newspaper sent a female reporter to interview her. This proved a bit frustrating for the young woman.

It seems Grandma peppered her with questions about how she managed her life as a wife, the mother of two preschoolers, and also worked for the newspaper. Through all this the reporter kept asking, "I do enjoy talking with you, but please, won't you tell me about the good old days?"

Finally, Grandma replied. "Well, the good old days weren't so great. You wouldn't have liked 'em much."

Not a bad role model for living, I'd say

As you might guess, I love Grandma's answer and I think it's a good attitude for any of us to hang onto as the years pass. After all, don't the experts keep telling us we need to "live in the moment"?

So let's make the most of today, as the psalmist advised us in Psalm 118:24, here from the ESV:

This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Here's to loving the life we have in the day we are living!

Lenore

Take Another Look at the “Good Old Days”

May 23, 2024
Have you ever looked up to the ceiling of a room and spotted a flyspeck you never noticed before?

Right away it's as if the rest of the room didn't matter because that FLYSPECK blotted out everything else.

Think of that "flyspeck" as an example of how a small concern easily can become the only thing one can think about.

Learning along the way

I wasted years fighting the tendency to get hung up on small annoyances and faults I spotted in other people. I easily could overlook the 90 percent positive in a situation because I was fixated on the 10 percent that wasn't.

All I accomplished with that was to cheat myself of joy, over and over.

Once I clearly understood that huge flaw in how I looked at life I wanted transformation.

I tried to do my part: I prayed and kept reading the Bible. I read good books about managing one's thoughts and staying positive. Still, I often found myself slipping back into that weakness.

Lesson learned: Habit is a tough task-master and will not easily give up its hold on us.

Change came, but at a crawl

I started small, by paying attention to how I responded to the everyday ups and downs of life. I posted sticky-note reminders around the house. Some days I made lists I could check off and reread as evidence of progress.

Silly as it may sound, it gave me a lift to say (or whisper) "'Atta Girl" to myself at any evidences of change for the good. (It still does.)

We all need encouragement, every bit as much as a toddler who is learning to walk.

Lesson learned: Only later did I understand that prolonged effort and what seemed to be slow progress actually helped build my faith and inner strength.

One step at a time

It's both encouraging and discouraging to realize there is no one perfect method to change. How could there be? Each of us is a one-of-a-kind creation. Some of us work through our challenges by talking with a friend or family member, while others thrive with the help of a pastor or professional counselor.

What I write here is simply how it worked for me. It sounds basic because it is.

First I had to promise myself I would concentrate on what is good and hopeful and not get hung up on the "what ifs" that popped up along the way.

Over time I learned how to "switch channels" and now when I slip up, it's not long before I'm back on track.

Other learnings as time went on

As any parent knows, our children are not carbon copies of us, which shows up early on. Most of us aim to learn and grow and adapt as we go. We made/make mistakes because we're in training. Our overall goal is to understand and work with the children God gives us.

Before we know it our kids are adults and they appreciate being treated as such. We often want to help and share what we learned from our own lives. Maybe they'll be glad for that, maybe not. Then what?

Lesson learned: It's good to take a step back and remind ourselves what we love and admire in them and in their choices. We need to be sure to let them know this, too. Often.

Avoid leaping to conclusions

Thanks to the Internet we can look up every nuance of everything, including ever little twinge or ache or upset we might encounter. Once we read all the awful outcomes this might indicate we sink into fear and alarm. All this before we go to the ER or see our doctor.

How do I know? Been there, done that.

No more. Overall I try to do what I can to stay healthy and get medical care when needed. I thank God every day for my "ordinary abilities" like being able to see and hear and all the rest. I never want to take that for granted.

Most of all, I trust that God is watching over me.

Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.   2 Timothy 1:7

Concentrating on what's good in life is not new thinking

Here are a few lines from a piece called "Salutation to the Dawn," written in about 2500 B.C., author unknown:

For yesterday is but a dream
And tomorrow only a vision,
But today well lived makes every yesterday
a dream of happiness
And every tomorrow a vision of hope.

For me, the best advice about living in the present always is this, from Psalm 118:24:

This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

"Let us … ." We can choose to rejoice and be glad in each day and what the day brings. Whatever comes, we have the power to choose how we look at our lives.

So let's forget about the flyspecks. The ceiling is not where we live.

Let's live in the day we're in and decide to be glad in it!

Still learning,

Lenore

Get Your Eyes Off That “Flyspeck” and Live!

April 25, 2024
A lot of people spend a lot of time wondering about the "If Onlys" of life:

    If only I could meet the right person and fall in love, then all my dreams would come true …

    If only we had better communication then our relationship would be perfect …

   If only we had a baby then our marriage would be stronger …

    If only we earned more money …

   If only we had a bigger/newer/nicer house in a better neighborhood, then life would be perfect …

    If only our children were through school and had good jobs and were married to the right people then I could stop worrying about them …

     If only I had the body I used to have …

    If only growing older weren't so scary …

    If only … then …

    If only …

    If …

There's a term for that: "Mythical thinking"

That's how some mental health professionals label it. Mythical thinking keeps us dreaming of a place where everyone and everything is–or could be–perfect.

Here's the problem. When we spend too much time daydreaming about Make Believe Land it's as if we put on blinders that shut out the sweet reality of our lives:

The beauty all around us, God's intricate creation.

The small, kind gestures of people in our lives. (Like the stranger who held open the heavy door when we were balancing shopping bags.)

The fun of watching our children grow into themselves, little by little over the years.

You and I weren't born wearing blinders

We pick them and put them on all by ourselves.

It can start with spending too much time reading other people's posts on the Internet, the ones that show their "perfect lives."

In the blink of an eye, joy flies out the window.

The thought and energy we invest on what could be/should be better takes us out of the day we're living. We risk becoming what I heard described years ago as, "Living a life fenced in on all four sides by the perpendicular pronoun, 'I.'"

That can blind us to God's daily blessings to us, large and small. We miss out on the joy of them and likely won't even think to say, "Thank you, Lord."

When we fixate on ourselves and our lives we miss a lot. We forget to encourage people around us with smiles and a few good words, such as: "Thanks!" "Good for you!" "I'm so proud of you!"

Some of us are thinking, Yes, but this is me and I don't know how to change. What am I supposed to do about that?

First comes being willing to be willing to change. With choosing to live in the now and to love in the now.

How do I start?

We always choose the outlook we put on. What God said to the Israelites applies to us, too:

I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live. Deuteronomy 30:19

Any time at all we can ask for help from the One who never takes His loving eyes off us:

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

Any time our past failings threaten to overwhelm us, the One who makes all things new is waiting:

If anyone is in Christ he (or she) is a new creation; the old has passed away; behold, the new has come.   2 Corinthians 5:17

What does it mean to be "in Christ?"

There's no big list of requirements here. When we trust in Jesus Christ as our Savior and aim to live by that faith, we are "in Christ."

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. John 3:16-17

That's the starting place and the ending place.

So how can one be happy, whatever comes?

Choose life! Choose to be alive in the moment and to see all the ways God has been–and is–blessing you.

Choose to be in Christ and know true inner peace. Nothing and no one else can bring deep-down joy that fills in your empty places.

This is not me, preaching to you. This is me sharing what countless millions of us over the centuries know to be true.

God bless you, my invisible reader friend,

Lenore
What would it take to make you happy?

March 12, 2024
That sounds impossible, doesn't it?

I used to think so, too. Then one day what I considered an inconvenience turned out to be pure blessing.

There I was, stuck in a line of shoppers waiting to check out at a local warehouse store. As usual, the place teemed with shoppers. Most of us were scowling and fidgety, checking our phones as we remained parked in line.

Not the petite older woman ahead of me. She seemed to have all the time in the world and looked around with a half-smile, as if she were slightly amused.

Finally she reached the checkout stand and the checker suppressed a yawn before saying, "Hello! Hope you're in the middle of a good day."

She smiled, then said, "Yes, of course I'm having a good day. I always have a good day."

"Really! How do you manage that?"

"Oh, it's easy. I decided a long time ago that I was done with having bad days. They're nothing more than a huge waste of time.

"I told myself that from then on I would have only good days–and I do, I really do. It took a little practice but now I refuse to get upset, no matter what happens."

The checker looked a bit flummoxed at that, but then said, "Um, that's great. You make it sound really simple."

"Well, I look at it this way: I'm the one in one in charge of my mind, nobody else."

As she put away her wallet and prepared to walk away she said, "I'm not handing that control over to anyone else."

She pointed upward

"Besides," she said, "I know who's watching over me, so I just figure one way or another, whatever happens HE will make everything work out okay."

By then all three of us were smiling.

The checker said, "Thanks, I needed that reminder today. When I get uptight I make myself take a few deep breaths. Then I shrug my shoulders a few times and try to relax."

As the little lady started to walk away, the checker said, "I like your way better. You decide beforehand your day will be good. I think I'll try that myself."

Our "teacher" flashed a parting smile and said, "You do that! Bet you'll be glad you did!"

I watched her while waiting for the checker to finish my order

She looked to be an oasis of serenity as she strolled through the crowd of hurrying people, many of them texting or talking on their phones while shushing their kids.

Her body language communicated that she possessed what I wanted for myself: A calm spirit. Inner peace. Smiles instead of frowns.

As I walked to my car I knew I would remember that encounter. My fellow shopper reminded me of what I had believed all my life, that yes, God is still in control and yes, I do have a will and and I choose how I look at life.

Before I even drove home I promised myself I would follow her example–and why couldn't I? She obviously drew her strength from the same Power Source I relied on, the One who never fails us.

I stuck with that resolution and began learning all over again to remember that each day is a gift from God. My call is to regard every day as a good day even before I began it.

She was right. I like this way much better, too.

Strength for the journey, especially on those "Who cares?" days

The Bible is filled with verses we can use as hand-holds whenever the climb feels too steep. Verses such as these:

This is the day the Lord has made; We will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid." John 14:27

"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." John 16:33

Growth can take awhile

For me it often feels like a two steps forward, one step back process. I came to understand that's okay because I still move one step closer to my goal.

I have learned over time that my nameless friend spoke deep truth that day. It makes all the difference to decide beforehand that our day(s) will be good That simple move changes us, changes how we see ourselves and our life situation.

Inevitably, how we relate to the people around us changes, too–and that can bring the sweetest reward of all. Every day of every year.

Blessings to you and yours,

Lenore

Here’s the simple secret to having only good days

January 6, 2024
It's surprising, but the true basics of making life better often sound too simple.

I found that to be true back when I was a young mother trying to hold it all together.

No matter how hectic the day, I never missed one syndicated column in our daily newspaper: "The Worry Clinic," written by a Dr. George Crane.

All I knew about "Dr. Crane" was what the tiny blurb at the bottom stated, that he was a licensed, professional counselor. But I liked his column because he mostly avoided psychiatric terminology and spoke plain English. I didn't always agree with him but often I found insights and ideas I hadn't thought about.

When I stumbled across a reprint of his column it felt like finding a lost friend

While searching for something else on Google, Dr. Crane's piece popped up. Immediately my mind flashed back to the first time I read these same words in our newspaper, then reread them. I clipped his column and taped it to a cupboard door.

After that I read it at least once a day, always asking God to help me stick with it.

One day at a time . . . Soon I noticed myself feeling more calm, more settled. More positive about my life, even though our family hubbub went on as usual.

Time hasn't changed my opinion that this wisdom still rings true

This is said to be an exact reprint of Dr. Crane's original piece, penned over a century ago. (Because of continuing requests it reappeared in his column periodically over the years. )

  JUST FOR TODAY

Here are ten resolutions to make when you awake in the morning.

They are Just for One Day. Think of them not as a life task but as a day’s work.

These things will give you pleasure. Yet they require will power. You don’t need resolutions to do what is easy.

1. Just for Today, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life-problem at once. I can do some things for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt I had to keep them up for a lifetime.

2. Just for Today, I will be Happy. This assumes that what Abraham Lincoln said is true, that “most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Happiness is from Within; it is not a matter of Externals.

3. Just for Today, I will Adjust myself to what Is, and not try to Adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my luck as they come, and fit myself to them.

4. Just for Today, I will take care of my Body. I will exercise it, care for it, and nourish it, and not abuse it nor neglect it; so that it will be a perfect machine for my will.

5. Just for Today, I will try to strengthen my mind, I will study. I will learn something useful, I will not be a mental loafer all day. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.

6. Just for Today, I will exercise my Soul. In three ways, to wit:

    (a) I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out. If anybody knows of it, it will not count.

    (b) I will do at least two things I don’t want to do, as William James suggests, just for exercise.

    (c) I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt. They may be hurt, but Today I will not show it.

7. Just for To-day, I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress as becomingly as possible, talk low, act courteously, be liberal with flattery, criticize not one bit nor find fault with anything, and not try to regulate nor improve anybody.

8. Just for Today, I will have a Programme. I will write down just what I expect to do every hour. I may not follow it exactly, but I’ll have it. It will save me from the two pests, Hurry and Indecision.

9. Just for Today, I will have a quiet half hour, all by myself, and relax. During this half hour, some time, I will think of God, so as to get a little more perspective to my life.

10. Just for Today, I will be Unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to be Happy, to enjoy what is Beautiful, to love and to believe that those I love love me.

                                                       (Written by Dr. George Crane in 1921)

If I said I ever mastered this list I would be lying

It still provides a checklist of how I want to live and look at life.

I suspect I'm not the only person who feels this way. As a Christian, I recognized it echoed Psalm 118:24:

This is the day that the Lord has made;

let us rejoice and be glad in it.

At any age, any stage of life, we start with rejoicing and deciding to be glad for the blessing of each day. If we add in Dr. Crane's principles, one by one, our tomorrows can't help being happier.

Working on it, too,

Lenore

Do You Want a Better Tomorrow? Start Here

September 23, 2023
Have you ever realized you walked blind and deaf through the day you just lived?

I have.

Times I listen, but do not hear and look, but do not see.

If you asked me I would reply, "Oh sure, of course I see the people and I know there is beauty all around me."

But that's a ho-hum response, isn't it?

Yes, I make it through the routines of the day, but here's the problem: My heart isn't in it.

This happens most often when I feel overwhelmed by some knotty issue I have to work through. Or some not-very-important choice between one thing and another and I can't make up my mind.

Whatever the reason, life feels full of stress and even though I know it makes no sense, I can't find calm.

Ever been there?

Proven ways to recover sight and sound–and joy in living

I learned a long time ago that at least for me, positive thinking and power affirmations are not enough. Mindfulness and meditation are trendy, but their power doesn't last long. Only some form of a strategy like this wakes up my senses and gets me back on track.

Realize the root cause almost always traces back to getting too wrapped up in myself and what I can do on my own. That usually follows a spell of neglecting to regularly spend time in the "Manufacturer's Handbook," aka, the Bible.
    Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. Psalm 119:105

Remember who's really in charge of the future.
   For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

Remind myself Jesus walks with me through each day–and night.
"… And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:20

Recount God's blessings, past and present. Often.
    From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another. John     1:16

Recall his promises. Daily.
   “Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28

Relax because I know who He is and I know who I am in Jesus.
    "I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that     bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5

Rejoice in the peace he gives.
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to     you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.”  John 14:27

Revel in the magnificence of it all, including the world all around me.
    Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever. Psalm     136:1

    And God saw all that he had made, and behold, it was very good. Genesis 1:31

“Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

This last verse is a good place to park my mind because it lays out the order of things.

Recalling what’s true resets our perspective

It's as if we look at our life and our world from another angle and it opens our eyes and ears. As Grandma used to say, we “get our heads on straight.”

Don't expect instant breakthroughs or sudden insights that solve problems. Most of the time the people around us stay the same and our lives look the same from the outside.

Rather, this is an inside job. We see more clearly the wonder and the joy of living that God showers on us every single day.

And that, my friends, makes all the difference.

Here’s to living life–fully,

Lenore
Don’t miss the wonder of your life

April 29, 2023