Category: Positive outlook

What makes some people maintain that spunk and feisty spirit into old age? Is it a temperament they're born with or do they choose it?

I've wondered about that for years,. The other day I got an e-mail from a relative with a photo of my aunt, who lives in Minnesota. Aunt Elsie is my father's baby sister and the only one of those five siblings still living on earth.

At age 101, she maintains the spirit and humor I always loved as a child. Now she lives in an assisted-living residence and walks with a walker. When someone commented she gets around very well, she said yes, she does. Then she smiled her old smile and said, "And I would dance, too, if I had a partner!"

That doesn't surprise me one bit. I haven't seen Aunt Elsie for years, but I always delighted in how she seemed to have fun wherever she was. I remember so well her laugh and her sparkling eyes.

Yet that didn't flow out of getting all the breaks in life. She and her husband worked hard running their own business. Childless for many years, they adopted a daughter and shortly thereafter had three kids of their own. At age four their oldest boy received a brain injury as the result of another driver hitting him while he crossed the street. He came out of the coma, but never was the same, never able to keep up with his siblings.

But life went on and so did Aunt Elsie and Uncle Earl and the rest of the family. That catastrophe took awhile for all of them to take in and get used to. Mostly they coped. They never doubted that God let their son live for a reason and they wouldn't look back. They suffered through all the usual emotions and grief, but they survived…and kept on believing, kept on loving.

These two lived through the usual ups and downs of rearing children to adulthood–and much more, besides. Aunt Elsie dealt with illnesses and the death of two husbands. But she never gave up. She lives on and laughs and jokes.

All along the way, she had choices to make. Would she become a harpy? A bitter woman, angry at God, perpetually expecting disaster? And who would have blamed her if she had.

But she didn't. She chose to go on believing that God loves her and her family, and watches over all of them. I'm betting she has read Psalm 139 over and over, sometimes looking for answers to her whys and sometimes soaking up reassurance.

Since my mom died before she reached age 55, I look at older women for role models of how to do it. I look at Aunt Elsie and all the others who choose to go on living with gusto and faith every day of their lives.

To me they're shining examples of the truth of Psalm 92:12, 14-15:

The righteous will flourish like a palm tree…They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green, proclaiming, "The LORD is upright' he is my Rock, and there is no wickedness in him."

Let's choose to be ageless…fresh and green every day of our lives!

Here's wishing you JOY in your journey through life,

Lenore

Your comments welcomed!

The secret of youth–and it doesn’t come in a jar

October 21, 2009
It's only September and already I miss the early morning sun. Ever since I was a little a girl, something within me rebels against getting up in the dark. I remember saying, "But nobody should have to get up in the dark, it doesn't even feel like morning yet!"

Even then early morning sunlight gladdened my heart. It still does. As Grandma used to say, it "gets me going."

But hey, I'm a big girl now. I know the routine. So I'll get up in the dark like most people do and I'll "get going" on my own. Still, as shorter days and longer nights press in, I need pansies. We discovered them as winter bloomers when we lived in the Northwest, with its long fall and winter seasons of cool, cloudy and rainy. Pansies don't care about the weather. No wonder I got addicted in no time.

We're in (drier) northern California now, but we read the handwriting of the seasons all around. That signals it's time to plant our annual guarantee of dependable winter sunshine: pansies. For me, their smiling faces brighten the shortest, dreariest day. We always plant some at the front door and also the back, so we see them all day. The other day while I ran errands, that terrific guy I married bought a bunch of them, then planted window boxes for the front railing and a pot for the back deck.

Whatever the weather I look at these blooms and see a visible symbol of hope. Nothing keeps them down, not clouds nor rain. Not even snow, as we discovered while growing them in the Northwest, where we sometimes had snow that lasted a day or two. Pansies may hang their heads for awhile, but then they pop back up, smiling. During cold spells they sort of fold into themselves. But then the sun shines and there they are, still blooming and brightening their corner of the world.

I look at these bright blooms and feel joy, even in dim light and on dark days. Does that sound over-simplistic? Maybe it is. On the other hand, it makes sense to train ourselves to savor the joy in simple everyday things. Otherwise, if it takes, say, a huge diamond ring to make us happy, we probably will wait a long time.

My grandmother was good at finding joy in life. I thought she had a gift for it. Now I understand it's a habit she developed. Like you and me, Grandma had the choice whether to see the light or fasten on the dark. Every day we choose to take joy in what's in front of us–like pansies–or clump around feeling deprived because we want something "special."

Truth is, every day is special, a gift. Every morning arrives with a fresh supply of joy and hope…if we choose to see it. If we run out by day's end, tomorrow we begin again, with a fresh supply.

The question for you and me is, how observant are we? Besides, beyond surfacey things like pansies, in this messed-up world where can we look for joy and hope?

I found some suggestions…

Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.

                                                                                    –Psalm 90:14

For you make me glad by your deeds, O LORD; I sing for joy at the works of your hands.

                                                                                    –Psalm 92:4

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him.

                                                                            –Psalm 62:5

Here's wishing you JOY and hope in the midst of life, a fresh supply every morning and may you know the Giver.

Lenore

Question for you:   What brings you joy and hope? Your sharing can bless the rest of us. (Just click on the word "comments" in the small print below, then follow directions.)

Find joy and hope, in every ordinary day

September 22, 2009
Do you ever find yourself going through life in neutral? I plead guilty. I got a lesson in joy the other morning and my smile lasted all day. Nothing out-of-the-ordinary, just one of those everyday blessings easy to miss.

Let me set the scene. The landscape we look at every day is fairly common for this part of California. Common-use open space runs behind our house. A walking trail runs though this unmowed area and it's dotted with several huge, gnarly oak trees. I've always loved the way they grow, even when I only saw them in movies.

Many species of birds call those ancient trees home. One or the other is always singing or chattering. My personal favorite is the mockingbird, which can go on for hours. (Some people find that annoying, I know.) These birds like high places. Frequently one hunkers down on the roof next door and serenades us.

I looked out the other morning, enjoying another serenade, thankful once again that mockingbird is "ours" and chose to perch on the tip of the topmost branch. Suddenly that plain gray bird jumped straight up in the air, landed in the same place and never stopped singing. The bird kept repeating that performance over and over. I watched for several minutes what looked very much like leaping for joy.

Not long after I heard an unfamiliar noise out back, a kind of chattering. Fifteen or so California quail had dropped in for a quick visit and were lined up along the top railing of our fence. We had spotted some a few times while walking the trail, but had never seen them up close. This covey clearly had a leader and seemed sociable, nodding their heads at each other, clucking and muttering in quail talk. They sounded so much like a group of women that I had to laugh.

Then I noticed that just behind that tree a young mule deer was grazing. It soon ambled its way off down the hill. Somehow, it seemed the finishing touch. (This was not the first time we've seen deer. Every now and then they come right up to that our back fence and nibble through the bars.)

Now the point to all this nature talk. First, I've been known to grumble (surprise!) Yet even when it seems the city crowds in, God provides reminders of his creation. How many other little blessings do I miss every day?

Second, I always get to choose how I look at life. Mockingbirds can be viewed as pests…or as wonderful songbirds. Deer pay no attention to regular height fences, they devour rose gardens and just about any bloom that's not purple, except for daffodils. Yet did you ever see a more graceful animal?

For right now, I want to keep before me the image of that mockingbird jumping straight up. It looked like sheer exuberance that had to be expressed. I'd like some of that quality for myself. How about you?

Here's to greeting our days with joy!

Love and blessings,

Lenore

Looking more closely may lead to jumping for joy

August 3, 2009
How's the mood at your house? Or in your mind?

Maybe we're all suffering from hearing too much gloomy news and soaking it up like sponges. No wonder we feel heavy.

Whatever the cause is–or isn't–we can do a U-turn in our thinking. Here's how, in the words of the Apostle Paul.

And now, dear friends, let me say one more thing as I close this letter.

Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right.

Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable.

Think about things that are excellent and worth of praise.

Keep putting into practice all you learned from me and heard from me and saw me doing, and the God of peace will be with you.

–Philippians 4:8-9 (New Living Translation)

Reading over that list, maybe you think this sounds like something you've heard on television. Just remember that the Paul and other Bible writers said it long before Oprah or Dr. Phil.

It's pretty simple, really. We're to keep putting the good stuff in (a la Paul) and commit our days and our future to God. He'll do the rest.

His peace to you, dear readers, wherever you are,

Love,

Lenore

Your comments welcomed!

Here’s a prescription for a healthy outlook

July 25, 2009
    I don't know about you, but I'm tired of the continual doom-and-gloom talk everywhere we turn. I don't think it helps any of us.

    You know how it goes. One reporter will say, "If … then … and then … we could … ."

    The other talking head responds, "And that could lead to … which would mean that … and then … we'd have ____ more layoffs, which would mean ____ more people couldn't make their mortgage payments. Foreclosures will skyrocket in our area!"

    Nobody seems to notice–or care–that everything starts with that little word, "if."

    For two minutes or so they've drummed up emotion and fear. Their facial expressions and tone of voice make it plain doom is imminent! Yet not one real thing has occurred.

    It's way too easy to get sucked in to this whirlpool of misery. When I do it's no time until I'm venting to my husband … or vice versa. Soon we're forecasting personal doom based more on someone else's conjecture than on fact.

   That quickly snatches the sunshine out of a room … or a life.

    So let's not join that crowd. Here's my proposal for coping with what comes. First, let's get a realistic grip on what affects our own lives and concentrate our energies there. Manage as wisely as we can, cut expenses where we can, appreciate what we already have. Living bountifully has nothing to do with having money. It's all about how we view our life.

    Second, let's look at what really matters and focus our attention there. Most of us would say that people matter more than things. So let's invest ourselves in other people. It costs nothing to speak encouragement or give someone a hug … and most of us could use more of both.

    Finally, let's count our blessings … over and over again. I think that's more than ticking off a list. Let's form a new habit: Pay attention to what is, more than longing for what isn't. Each time we do we'll feel more confident, more sure of our life, more at peace.

    When we share a life, whether with a spouse or a child, little aggravations often cloud our vision. It helps to set them aside for awhile and look at this person with a stranger's eyes. Do we spot virtues we had been ignoring? Remember, small virtues count. (Ever forgotten to put out the garbage when your husband was out of town? Then you know what I mean.) If you feel shortchanged, ask God to enlarge your perception.

    If you live with those recording devices a.k.a., kids, remember that your attitude(s) become theirs. Your fear(s) become theirs … even when they never say a word or ask a question. No child ever is oblivious to their parents' state-of-mind.

    Finally, when it comes to fear, whether of recession, depression, or a change in government, let's remember who's in charge. Today I got an e-mail you may have received at some point, one with beautiful photography and a meaningful message. It points us to the verse in the center of the Bible: Psalm 118:8. This is the perfect motto for you and me in these troubled times … or any time.

It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.

    Next time we're tempted to sink in despair, let's go back to this verse and pitch a tent. Fortunes come and go. Governments rise and fall. Only One was there before the beginning and will be there after the end. Only One has proven to be absolutely trust-worthy over time. He's the one who watches over us and who blesses your life and mine.

    By the way, here's the address for that video I referenced above: 70670-TheBibleDV.pps (2473KB)   (Sorry, you'll need to copy, then paste it to access it.) Enjoy!

    Have a refreshing weekend!

    Lenore

    What do you think about this? Your comments welcomed!



Let’s not let talk of the “downward spiral” drag us down!

January 24, 2009
    If you lived halfway around the world, would you be waiting for the inauguration of Barack Obama as President of the USA?

    Probably so. Many will cheer because he'll be our first African-American President. But there's more to it than that. All over the world people marvel that in the United States, power passes from one administration to another without riots, without wars or assassinations. Instead, we have parades and parties, all of it broadcast freely–in its entirety–over national television and radio. If you or I could find a way to shoe-horn ourselves in among the one million plus people who plan to shiver away many frigid hours, we could at least be in Washington, D.C., to be present.

    After all, this is America! We take it for granted, forgetting this is rare. Not many countries in this world change parties or governments so calmly.

    We are blessed, bountifully. We are free to rant and rave about what's wrong with this country, or with whatever the current administration happens to be doing–or not doing. We can march and carry signs. No one comes to cart us off to prison. This is America.

    After eight years as President, George W. Bush will become a private citizen and quietly go home to Texas. Throughout his years in office our nation faced many challenges, beginning with September 11, 2001, before he had been in office a year. He leaves when we're in the middle of one of the biggest crises, and his popularity ratings are at their lowest. I wish him and his wife, Laura, much happiness in this new phase of their life together.

    I am sad for him … and for her. I believe he did the best he knew how, with what he knew at the time. Since he often professed his faith, I take him at his word that he sought God's guidance every day, then went forth and did his job.

    By now I've lived long enough to know that's all any of can do, whether we're a President, a parent, or a paper-hanger.

    I almost always know more afterward than I did at the time I had to make a decision. Later, sometimes much later, I find I have a better grasp on what was involved. Perhaps I've come to understand the wider picture, or I know the people involved better than I did, or I'm simply wiser and more seasoned. Alas, I cannot go back and live it over. Neither can President Bush.

    Neither can anyone else. Whoever coined the term, "Hindsight is 20/20," said it well.

    I have no idea how history will view his Presidency. It is interesting to remember that the press and people universally trashed Abraham Lincoln almost every day he lived in the White House. He was hated by both the North and the South. The names they called him make the labels hung on George Bush look tame. Yet he calmly stood his ground, never wavering, because his passion was for justice and freeing the slaves.

    Now he's known as our greatest President, the role-model and inspiration for President Obama.

    I did not vote for Barack Obama, but as our elected President, he merits our full support. I pray his administration will succeed mightily. I do think it's wonderful that an African-American man rose to the Presidency, and I pray it will heal the old wounds and animosities. We are, after all, the United States of America. That implies we, the people, too, are to be united.

Since he has said he is a Christian, I'm guessing he, too, will pray for God's guidance each day. Then he'll go forth and do his job, the best he knows how, with what he knows at the time.

    As always, I'll pray God's wisdom and leading for our President and for all those who lead our nation. As always, I'll try not to expect perfect performance. (Does that look anything like expecting his decisions always to please me?)

     I'm thankful our new President loves his wife, Michelle, and their two daughters. I'm thankful he talks about respect and honoring authority, about the value of working and finishing school. President Obama and Michelle have the platform to be powerful role models and to inspire many, young and old. Their positive comments about family may turn around some alarming trends in our society. I'm thankful they're Christians.

    As we enjoy the pomp and circumstance of another Presidential inauguration and the hoopla surrounding it, let's give thanks. We are privileged to live in the greatest nation on the face of the earth–and let's not forget it. What's more, let's talk it up! Let's speak hope and reassurance when others are talking gloom and forecasting doom! That will cost us zero, but pay big dividends in so many ways, in our lives and in our communities.

    Because you and I and all of us together are the United States of America, not just our new President.

    Won't you join me in daily asking God to bless and protect the United States and our leaders? And enjoy the festivities!

    Lenore



Let’s celebrate what makes us “America!”

January 19, 2009
    We're about to enter the New Year … 2009! A period of time as unknown to us as if we were following a mountain path into thick fog. We only think we know what lies ahead.

   I love some things about the arrival of another New Year, like putting up new calendars. Who could miss the symbolism of "off with the old, on with the new?"

    Whatever 2008 was … or wasn't … it lies behind us. Ahead lie 365 uncommitted days. Freedom! Freedom, that is, until I start writing in those unavoidables of life, the meetings and appointments already scheduled … and there will be more. That task makes me feel organized, but also weighed down as I watch those unsullied days fill up. Knowing I've chosen most of those commitments helps, but hey, they nail down my time. I'm one of those people who likes keeping her options open, because who knows what possibilities may arise?

    But then I get a grip. I wouldn't trade places with anyone. Many of those notations remind me that I'm needed, or I make a difference, or simply that I matter in someone else's life. There's nothing that brings more deep-down joy.

    At any point, you and I have this day, this moment. That's scary, but also comforting. We don't have to deal with 365 days, only the one we're living in. Still, beginning a new year feels like starting a journey, not quite sure where one will end up. None of can foretell what 2009 will bring.

    For years I had a piece of writing framed on my office wall, and I love it still.

                                               "The Gate of the Year"

    And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year:  "Give me a light, that I may tread safely into the unknown!"

    And he replied:   "Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God. That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way."

                                                                                        –M. Louise Haskins

     I can't say it better than that. So let's step off into the unknown with gusto! As long as we hold tight to the Father's hand, we'll be safe.

    May God watch over you and yours every day of the New Year!

    Lenore

    Your comments welcomed!



Are you ready to step into the abyss?

December 30, 2008
    I'm keeping a count of how many times I'm asked, "Well, are you ready for Christmas?"

    Evidently every checker in the United States is trained to ask this question. I still smile whenever I remember the time I answered, "No, I'm not. I really don't know how it can be time for Christmas already!

    My answer attracted the attention of a little woman in the aisle next to me. She looked to be about eight-five or so years of spunk. This rosy-cheeked lady fixed her sparkling blue eyes on me and took on the air of an old-timey school-marm. She left me no wiggle room at all. "But my dear!" she said, "All year long you've known it was coming!"

   Who could argue with that logic? Guess I'm a slow learner, for here I am, once again playing catch-up. Let's just say life intervened with my well-laid plans.

    Getting ready for Christmas could leave a person feeling depleted. Too much to do, too many places to go, trees to trim, cards to write, packages to mail. So it could seem natural to feel depleted … if not for the fullness of Christmas.

    I feel that fullness every time we open a Christmas card and touch hearts with ones we love! Reading their notes and letters, we laugh, and at times we cry with them. Memories spring up out of nowhere, ready to be relived and flood the heart with joy all over again. Every year I scramble to write notes on the (copied) letters we send, and each one we receive feels like a gift from the heart.

    And have you noticed? People smile more in December. Perhaps that's because we focus on what we can give and what we can do for other people, rather than on what others could–or should, we think–do for us. We smile as we gather toys for toy drives and food for community food pantries and bake cookies for (it seems) the whole world.

    That fits, because Christmas is the season for giving.Think about the name: "Christ-mas."

    This is the time to remember again the wonder of it all, the birth of the Christ child, Jesus. GOD come to earth in human form. The Gift beyond description.It seems inconsequential to dither over whether December 25th actually marks the date of his birth, because it falls at just the right time. In this season of dark mornings that hang on too long and cold, dark evenings that come too soon, we especially need the Light!

    So if you, too, still have cards to write and packages to wrap and mail, let's breathe deep right now and rejoice. It's Christ-mas! True, bad news dominates the news and we still don't have peace on earth. Yet we can experience peace in our hearts, even in the midst of our rushing and scurrying.

    That peace will carry us through Christmas Day, through all our days … and beyond.

    Happy rushing around! Here's wishing you peace, deep-down and lasting, and joy that makes your heart sing!

    Lenore

    What's your favorite part of Christmas? Your comments welcomed!



What do you do with that question everyone asks at Christmas?

December 18, 2008
    What do you remember of how the first Thanksgiving came to be?

    Let's step back in time to 1620. Probably we vaguely recall the Mayflower, the ship that brought those settlers from Plymouth, England, to North America. On a family vacation to the East Coast we visited Plymouth, MA. The Plimoth Plantation is a living history museum erected on the site of that original settlement. Anchored at the shore is the Mayflower II, a reproduction.

    How tiny that ship was! Yet 388 years ago people like you and me gathered their families and braved crossing the Atlantic on that ship. Once we stepped aboard, it seemed even smaller. Picture ceiling heights about 65 inches, with berths about 3 ft. by 6 ft. Costumed guides told us each passenger was allowed their berth, including space above and below it, for their trunks and chests. That small ship was crammed with food and supplies, household goods for their future homes, even goats.

    During their long, miserable voyage on the choppy Atlantic, two passengers died and many more sickened. They finally reached harbor on December 11, naming it New Plymouth.

     Imagine yourself one of that intrepid band, weary to the bone from the arduous journey, half-sick, undernourished on the diet of mostly oatmeal, turnips and dried ox tongues. Imagine your dismay at finally arriving at a typical Massachusetts December scene, probably much like this.

    William Bradford, the first governor of the Plymouth colony, wrote: "Being thus arrived in a good harbor and brought safe to land, they fell upon their knees and blessed the God of heaven … They had now no friends to welcome them, no inns to entertain or refresh their weatherbeaten bodies, no houses, or much less towns to repair to, to seek for succor … What could now sustain them but the spirit of God and his grace?"

    That first winter forty-four of the original colonists died. more would have died if not for the Mayflower captain's decision to remain anchored off-shore. With only one makeshift shelter on shore, that cramped ship remained "home" for many months. Once the weather warmed, the survivors finally could hunt the abundant game they had been unable to hunt when landing.

    An English-speaking native they named Squanto befriended them and helped arrange a peace treaty with the Wampanoags. Then Squanto showed them his people's ways of planting corn and other crops. Early summer brought drought, but by autumn these settlers harvested their crops. As they stored away food for the coming winter, they took stock. yes, they had survived, but they had made seven times more graves than huts. Only three families remained unbroken.

    Governor Bradford describes that time this way: The Lord sent them … seasonable showers, and through His blessing caused a fruitful and liberal harvest, to their no small comfort and rejoicing. For which mercy, in time cconvenient, they also set apart a day of Thanksgiving."

    So the settlers invited their Wampanoag friends to join them and welcomed the food and game they brought along. Together, they feasted and rejoiced. Those early settlers, at least, thanked God, even while remembering their departed family members and friends.

    This scene strikes me as especially poignant this year, when financial losses seem to affect most of us, and we're anxious. I think those settlers we call Pilgrims have much to teach us about turning our eyes to what remains, rather than being fixed on what is lost.

    What if we added up what's good and right and meaningful in our own lives? Suppose we, like the Pilgrims, leave our accumulated pain with the Lord and thank Him for His presence with us. Could we, like them, simply trust our future to Him?

    A beloved Bible verse fits every day, but especially at Thanksgiving.

Give thanks unto the LORD, for he is good, his love endures forever.     –Psalm 107:1

    That hard year was not the end of the Pilgrims' story. It was the beginning of a new chapter. That's worth considering, no matter what our age or our situation.

    May you have a blessed Thanks-giving Day, and may you have family and friends to share it with!

    Lenore

    What blessings are you thankful for? Your comments welcomed!

Learning from those early settlers and that first Thanksgiving

November 26, 2008
    That's a question that never loses its relevance. Regardless of our age or stage in life, how much money we have or don't have, or whether or not we have children, that question fits.

    More than anything else, our answer determines whether we describe ourselves as "happy" or "unhappy." Our answer sets the criteria for whether–in our own eyes–we're rich or poor, healthy or unhealthy, liked or disliked, blessed or cursed.

    I once met an old woman who lived in one room in a rundown building and ate a meager diet. She invited me to look around her "lovely home," all the while describing herself as "rich" and "blessed." This vibrant, glowing woman of faith oozed contentment and joy out of every pore. Was she rich, or was she poor? You decide.

   No, she didn't live in a Third World country. She lived in metro Los Angeles, in a changing neighborhood that once was grand.

    I came away from that encounter vowing never to complain again or wish for "more."

    Have I? Of course. But when I'm wise enough to remember meeting Frieda, it brings me back to center. Then I realize that if I haven't liked my life lately, the problem is not my life. It's me.

   This much I've learned: At every moment of our life there's a positive side and a negative side. Every moment we decide which one we focus on.

   Here's to looking at what's good and right and true!

    Lenore

    Ever find this a struggle? Your comments welcomed!



How do you view your life?

November 13, 2008