Author: lbuth0511de28fc

We all carry around within us a self-image that traces to words.

Good words and not-so-good words, usually from someone we looked up to.
Dads. Moms. Other family members. Teachers. Coaches.

If your memories of childhood only make you smile, you're blessed.

Many were not so fortunate. Maybe you've spent most of your life trying to forget what someone said or the name(s) they called you.

The people we love and respect hold the power to wound us most deeply, whether deliberately or unintentionally.

Some of us heard words like these as we were growing up

"You make me sick!"

"Can't you ever do anything right?"

"You've always been a loser and you're headed for trouble, I just know it."

Words like these lodge deep down within a child or teenager and cloud their view of themselves and what's possible.

Even between adults this kind of talk can poison self-esteem and shred the fabric of a marriage.

In some families–or marriages–hurtful remarks are so routine it may appear no one is paying attention to what's said. That doesn't mean they slide off us like rain on a windowpane. Our careless words can sting and leave scars, even–or perhaps more so–if we hear them all the time and think we're tuning them out.

(And have you noticed how one biting word leads to an even worse response?)

You and I are not immune simply because we're Christians. As usual, the Apostle Paul had something to say about this:

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. –Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)

The past is behind us, but the future lies ahead

It's important to know we don't have to carry around those old negative labels and messages for the rest of our lives. You are not the labels someone else hung on you!

You are you. Not perfect, but on the grow.

So dig out that old list and look at those rocks of desperation in the light of adulthood. Let them shrink down to their appropriate size, which will be close to zero.

(If you can't shake them yourself, schedule a few visits with a licensed counselor.)

After that do an honest self-assessment. If you're comfortable with it, show it to people who know you well and will give you an honest read on who you are. Let them tell you who you are.

Then believe it!

What if within our own family we specialized on life-giving words?

No parent–or spouse–is perfect, but we can change. At any age. Or rather, God can change us and we can grow into a person who speaks life.

Life-giving words can change lives.

Let's be clear. "Life-giving words" are not the same as the practice of telling children, "You're amazing!" for every little thing.

What truly helps youngsters feel good about themselves and builds their self-confidence is when we compliment their honest efforts and can smile even when they come out on the losing side. That's the time to say, "I was proud of you today. You played a good game!" (Or, "You tried really hard and that will pay off.")

The great thing–and a hard thing–is that we parents need to pay attention so our words count. "I know you studied and you did your best on that test, so I'm proud of you." "I saw you being kind to your little sister just now and that makes me proud of you and your generous heart."

This kind of compliment helps kids know what matters most. They'll stand a little taller than before you spoke. Life-giving words also show that Dad or Mom value character more than simply coming out on top.

Our words gain authenticity when children can see that's how their parents live their lives, too.

It's not only children who crave words that give life

Adults are just grown-up kids who live on a steady diet of pressure. No wonder husbands and wives hunger to hear good words from each other.

But over time it's oh so easy to lose touch and to live as "married singles."

Life-giving words nourish and strengthen the marriage bond, even when it seems to be gasping for life. Force-feeding sweet words feels phony–and it is. Steady and sincere love–in word and actions–is far more effective, recognizing from the start that new growth may take time.

What kind of words?

"I know you have it within you to be a success at whatever you do."

"Thanks. I appreciate you."

"It means so much to know I can always count on you."

"I love you."

Do you think a steady diet of such words would change the climate within a home–or send a youngster into the world feeling secure?

(Would it make your heart smile if your wife or husband frequently spoke to you that way?)

Again, Paul lays out our motivation.

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility,gentleness and patience. . . . And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. –Colossians 3:12,17 (NIV)

There you have it, the basis for all our words. Within our own homes, our own marriages and families, let's speak words that give life to the people around us.

They're the gift that truly does keep giving–for life.

Still growing, too,

Lenore
Who told you who you are–and do you still believe it?

June 13, 2018
This time of year most older high-schoolers–and their parents–are tied up in knots about what comes next.

Everyone wants to make the absolutely right choice.

College graduates are tense, too, looking for the absolutely perfect job.

That could be a long wait.

Recent graduates often feel dumped out in a world that's nothing like the dream they bought with their student loans. Some resign themselves to any job they can get that includes a regular paycheck. Others keep chasing their ideal.

Life is hard. How many of us tell our kids that beforehand?

1. Tell your kids the truth

One columnist noted that today's graduates grew up with parents who continually asked, "How does that make you feel, Honey?"

No wonder the world of employment offers a rude shock. Bosses seldom ask, "How do you feel about that?"

Employers want employees to show up on time, stay until quitting time and get the job done well and on schedule. They concentrate on the bottom line because unless their business turns a profit, there's no money to stay in business.

Or issue paychecks.

We do our kids no favor when we groom them to expect life should feel cozy and warm, like a mommy's hug.

2. Be a true friend to your children

A good friend speaks truth, even when we don't want to hear it. Our children deserve the same from us.

Sooner or later, most of us learn the no-nonsense foundation for success along the way. In school, in the job world, or even in our personal lives, here's the formula:

W-O-R-K.

Sounds hopelessly outdated, doesn't it?

That's especially true after hearing commencement speakers–and parents–who so often tell young people, "Follow your bliss! Live for your dreams! Refuse to settle for less than what makes you happy!"

Then someone will bring up Facebook founder, Mark Zuckerberg, who became a billionaire at age twenty-seven.

Reality check: How many Mark Zuckerbergs do you know personally?

3. Plant good seeds, so your kids can harvest good fruit

Love your children enough to speak lasting truth. Even in a dream job, they will have to prove themselves.

Most employees start at the bottom. It will be a slow climb from there.

They will not like parts of it. Guaranteed. Life is hard, remember? This is what hard looks like.

A runner talked of training for a track meet. "Runners know you must keep your eyes on your goal. If you waver and look down at the track your energy goes to what's under your feet and you'll lose the race."

To build a strong career, marriage or family we can't allow small annoyances to get us down. We need to fasten on what's good and let the other stuff go.

4. Nail it home that a good life does not depend on having every dream come true

Give your children a lasting gift. Tell them nobody has everything they want or everything as they want it to be.

Help them understand that individuals who expect that or insist upon it set themselves up for lasting discontent.

Wealth and achievements can never fill our inner emptiness because there will never be enough of either.

Happiness and satisfaction stem from how we look at life and from thanking God for our blessings.

A grateful spirit is a contented spirit.

5. Remember to pass on eternal truths

Be sure your children learn about Jesus Christ, our Savior. Worship together as a family and cultivate friendships with other Christian families.

Faith is the real key to a fulfilling life and peace within.

The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace. –Psalm 29:11

Jesus said:

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." –Matthew 6:33

Life in the real world is unpredictable and the only solid Rock is Jesus.

What we're talking about is helping our kids take on life without life getting the best of them. We moms and dads do that all along, little by little as we encourage them to keep trying and try again and to keep going. And we dole out love and hugs every chance we get.

Parenting is a process that goes on as long as we live, even though it changes form over the years.

Call it what it is: Privilege. Blessing. Joy.

Thanking God, too,

Lenore

Tell your kids the facts about life in the real world

May 30, 2018
It's the time of year when we celebrate the those who gave their lives so this could remain The Land of the Free.

Most of the time we take all this for granted, as if freedom were our natural right.

Not true. Freedom carries a terrible price tag.

On Memorial Day we count the cost in lives. For once we take a sober look at the truth.

Every headstone represents a person who lived, someone with a family who still grieves the loss of this life.

These individuals died so you and I could walk around without fear.

Their families lost someone dear to them so our Nation's government could continue to function as it has from the beginning. Now as then, you and I are absolutely free to vote for whomever we choose as our President–and all other lawmakers–in every level of government.

Free to worship God as we choose. Free to live where we choose. Free to send our children to whatever school(s) we choose and can afford.

Those who died to preserve these rights were–and are–heroes. They deserve the ceremonies and the flags that fly on their graves in military cemeteries all across the world.

Ever wondered how all those flags "magically" get placed every Memorial Day?

Here in the United States credit almost always goes to local Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts and Brownie troops.

Placing flags fits right in with Scouting goals. They want to build character and help develop citizens who participate, rather than sit on the sidelines.

Scouting couldn't exist without the moms and dads who support leaders and kids in so many ways.

Kneeling at graves and placing flags can be a significant experience. For at least a little while these youngsters will think of the bravery and sacrifice of those who died.

As for the rest of us, why not speak our thanks to these young people? And their parents? And their troop leaders?

Kids need heroes. So do we all

Especially now, when cynicism is running wild among us.

Late-night comics and talking heads endlessly slice-and-dice this individual and that one, over and over. Everyone is fair game, from the President on down.

Such critics get praise for their "wit" and "remarkable insights."

Do any of them–or do we–ever stop to think that it's a privilege–a precious gift–to be able to speak their minds? Or for us to listen to any speaker we want? Or watch any TV channel or webcast that fits our whim of the moment? Or read any newspaper or book we fancy?

All of it without fear someone will find out and report us?

You and I did not earn these rights ourselves. They did.

Memorial Day reminds us who we are

It seems to me we value being Americans too cheaply. We are a Nation birthed out of courage by those who risked everything to bring these United States into being.

Our founding fathers cared enough to fight for our liberty as a people.

Every individual who gave their life to preserve that liberty is proof the courage of those early patriots lives on.

Franklin D. Roosevelt, U.S. President during most of World War II, said,

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear."

How can you and I show courage and be a blessing now?

We can focus on what's right and good. We can speak well of our Nation and its leaders. We can stand for what's true and honorable in whom and what we applaud and reject what is not.

Like the Scouts, we can participate, rather than sit on the sidelines and carp.

That may include teaching the great old patriotic songs and poems–and the Pledge of Allegiance–to our children and grandchildren. (Never assume they automatically learn them in school.)

Why would I say that? Because I sing with a chorus and we almost always close with a patriotic song such as "God Bless America," or "The National Anthem." We see the same thing every time we perform. When invited to sing along, most adults–especially seniors–know every word.

Children, teens and many young adults usually remain silent. If asked why, they answer, "Because I don't know the words."

What more can we do to be a blessing?

When we spot a veteran or a current member of the Armed Forces, we can say, "Thank you for your service and for keeping our country free!"

Most of all, we can pray for our leaders and affirm what is good.

I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone–for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior, who wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.  –1 Timothy 2:1-4 NIV

Whatever our personal life challenges may be, we can pray for guidance and strength and trust God's goodness.

Good times or hard, God is with us

We can take God's word to His people–and us–seriously, as recorded in Joshua 1:9.

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." NIV

Surely God's hand of blessing has been on these United States from the beginning. We do well to remember that, especially in this time when our nation seems so divided from within while dangers lurks on all sides.

Even as we honor those who gave their lives to keep these United States free, we thank God for His goodness.

If we keep that mindset and profess the faith and confidence within us, we will be remembered as people who made our own small world a better place, just by being alive.

God bless America!

Lenore

What does it cost to keep us living in freedom?

May 23, 2018
Someone has said, "When a child is born, a mother is born."

It may be hard to imagine of our own moms, but it's true. Every mother since time began has groped her way through unknown territory, made mistakes and learned on the job.

I know people who consider their moms angels.

I also know a few who've always blamed their mothers for ruining their lives and they long to erase even their memory of them.

Probably most of us fall somewhere in between.

Knowing now what I wish I knew then

My mother died way too young, a few months after she turned 54. It took me a long time to understand how much of her is in me.

Like my love of music.

All I knew as a preacher's kid was that my parents were always up front. Mom always played the organ or piano for everything.

She also gave piano lessons. Every day one or more kids, usually towed by eager parents, showed up in our living room after school. With them came the standard admonition: "Be quiet."

That meant my job was to keep my three noisy, energetic sisters quiet for most of an hour and often to get supper started. The clock never moved slower! All in all, I considered Mom's music more a nuisance than a blessing.

I yearned for a "normal" mother

As far back as I can remember once the evening chores were done Mom would play the piano for her own enjoyment, often the music of classical composers.

Music had drawn my parents together in the beginning, so when Dad had a free night he often joined her, his beautiful tenor soaring while she accompanied him.

Small wonder that many a Sunday he would not only preach, but sing a solo while Mom, the organist/pianist accompanied him.

The congregation always loved it. I knew my parents were talented, but as a kid I wished they were sitting with us in the pew instead of always up front.

What I didn't understand in time

Because of who she was I became familiar with classical and folk melodies and absorbed music through my pores. Every time I hear some of Mom's favorites, I think of her.

I wish I had told her that while I had the chance.

Mom left more than music behind. With her love of beauty and sense of style she made the most of Dad's small salary. She'd stick one zinnia in a vinegar bottle and have a centerpiece.

Besides that, she knew how to jazz up an old outfit and give it some style. My mother probably learned that from her mother, who made fancy hats and clothing and turned out intricate needlework.

Mom held her own in the kitchen, too. She knew how to make food taste good and look good.

The perpetual student

Most of her life my mother kept on learning, everything from trying a new recipe to mastering a challenging concerto.

Was she perfect? No. Is anyone?

I think the demands of her life often overwhelmed her. Today I view her failings more charitably than I once did, probably because I know my own so well.

I know now Mom did what most of us do, the best she knew how. I thank God for her life and her faithfulness.

My mom believed in Jesus

Because she absolutely trusted Him and believed Bible verses like this, she did not fear death.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. –John 3:16 (ESV)

Like her, I live in the forgiveness all believers share and I know when Mom stopped breathing she went home to Him.

Yet my mother lives within me still, as elusive as the whiff of a fragrance I can't quite identify.

And I am grateful, so grateful.

Question for you: In what way(s) do you carry your mother with you?

Blessings and joy,

Lenore

Mothers, the lingering fragrance in our minds and hearts

May 10, 2018
Perhaps the most shocking thing about another school shooting is that we're not so shocked any more.

This is the world we live in. Try to make sense of. Weep over. Pray for.

Over and over people in the media and Experts of all kinds tell us that whoever the current perpetrator happens to be is "disturbed."

Why? Blame it on any of these: "Has a record of being in trouble." "Came from a dysfunctional home." "Grew up without a father." "Had physical or mental challenges." "Lived in poverty." "Had alcoholic parents." "Lacked good role models." "Fell through the cracks."

Take your pick.

Looking deeper

Name any underlying cause you choose, whether on that list or not. All are disadvantages, not justification for violent behavior.

Otherwise, countless individuals over the centuries could not have survived such circumstances and yet gone on to achieve, sometimes notably.

If all that mattered were the trappings of one's growing-up years, then every child of wealthy and famous parents–the more, the better–would be perfectly adjusted and living a life to be admired.

News accounts and celebrity mags provide endless evidence this is not so.

How do we find our way?

First we face the anguishing reality of life: The list of things we have control over is quite small.

For example, this latest shooting took place in Parkland, FL, a high-income community considered by residents to be safe and therefore, secure.

Obviously not. It's not the neighborhood. It's not how large our income. It's not being able to give our kids "all the advantages."

Rather, security flows out of knowing:

Who/what we believe in

Where we–and our children–can turn for reassurance

The foundation we are building our lives on is unshakable

Security rests on what's within us, not on what's around us.

Oh, come on, that's too simplistic

If you doubt that, read a few biographies of individuals who overcame big odds.

I met one of those over-comers when he spoke at a business meeting. At the time he was "just" a surgeon known for separating conjoined twins. Since then he retired and now Dr. Ben Carson has been appointed secretary of Housing and Urban Development.

That's quite a long journey from growing up in a single-parent family, living in a public housing project for years and playing with rocks found along the railroad tracks as he walked to school.

What brought him through all that? He credits what he learned from his mom, who always left home before he got up and often came home after dark because she worked two jobs.

(You can read their story here:) http://awomansview.typepad.com/a_womans_view/2017/03/take-heart-mom-you-are-your-childs-biggest-advantage-in-life.html

Shoring up our inner defenses

It starts with taking charge of what we feed our minds and therefore, what we give out to our families.

If healthy food builds healthy bodies–and it does–then focusing on Jesus and His love for us, His strength within us, will build strength within us and our children.

In time of crisis what's inside us is what inevitably will come out of us.

If we feed ourselves–and our loved ones–fear, it will be fear.

If we feed ourselves–and our loved ones–talk of God's strength within us, what comes out of us will be courage and peace.

Put the good stuff in

We're never too old or too young to grow in faith. Even small children easily learn "Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so," especially if we sing it with them.

Talking to Jesus is natural for young children and they love knowing they can pray in any scary situation, "Jesus, help me!"

Kids equipped with these plain truths from early on know that someone loves them, no matter what. They know they're not alone.

Does that make trouble and danger go away? Maybe not. But it does reassure youngsters (and adults, too,) that they're not alone and forsaken.

When life bumps us around we draw on our reserves

If we're to have a store of courage and strength to draw on we need to regularly deposit Truth into our memory banks. Truths from God's written word, the Bible, like these favorite verses.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.  –Psalm 46:1

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  –Isaiah 41:10

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.  –Joshua 1:9

These three are just for starters. You'll find many more as you read your Bible. Underline the verses that speak to your heart. Memorize them or list them on your SmartPhone. Find your way to be able to find them quickly.

The bottom line: How shall we live without fear?

As usual, we get to choose. We can watch the news and look around and live in fear.

OR we can live by faith in the Lord of heaven and earth and we can teach our children the truths of Scripture.

Like taking the right turn at a crossroads, that makes all the difference.

So let's speak faith, not fear. Let's live with courage, trusting God all the way,

Lenore
How can we–and our children–live without fear in a world of horror headlines?

February 21, 2018
The other day I heard a story that touched my heart and it's too good to keep to myself.

There are a couple of versions, but they all trace back to fact. Take yourself back to 1920s, when people paid and often traveled great distances to hear dramatic speakers recite poems and speeches.

Here's the story. Step into this scene and enjoy.

Friends of one much-acclaimed actor and orator threw a lavish party in his honor. More than a hundred guests attended, all dressed in their best finery.

Each guest felt privileged to be present since the famous guest traveled extensively and drew large (paying) crowds wherever he went. One of the guests asked, "Would you kindly favor us with your rendering of the Twenty-third Psalm?"

At once the great man in his designer tuxedo and multiple gold rings launched into a dramatic rendition, complete with well-practiced flourishes and gestures. At the end the audience gave the speaker a prolonged standing ovation.

Then from the back of the great room an older man dressed in a well-worn suit stood and asked, "Might I also speak this Psalm?"

With permission given, the gray-haired man slowly, carefully made his way to the front of the room. Surprised guests sat politely, prepared to be unimpressed.

Then the old man began to speak and a hush fell over the room. Listeners sat with tears streaming down their cheeks and many began weeping loudly. Once he finished the roomful of listeners sat without moving for several minutes.

Later someone asked the great orator why the audience showed such different responses to hearing the same Psalm. He answered, "I know that old man, so I know the reason.

"You see, I know the words. But that man, he knows the Shepherd."

Right about now seems the perfect time to revisit Psalm 23

Back then the older man would have quoted the King James Version, so that's what you'll read here. Yes, we now have other translations and paraphrases, but let's remember that for many years the KJV served as an English textbook in many of our schools.

So take time to drink in these beautiful words. They are true for you and for me, as much now as from the beginning–and forever. As Jesus said in Mark 13:30: "Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will never pass away."

Psalm 23

¹The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.

²He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

³He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

⁴Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

⁵Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

⁶Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.

Just the words themselves are comforting, aren't they?

I find speaking them aloud soothes my spirit, especially when I'm feeling troubled. If you haven't already made this practice your own, I hope you'll try it.

And may you, too, know the Lord as your Good Shepherd. Let Him lead you through and restore your tired heart.

I promise you He will.

Lovingly,

Lenore

Real faith always shines through–and communicates

January 10, 2018
If Messiah fills the air waves and our arms are getting sore

    From the Christmas cards we've written, but we've still a whole lot more,

    Yet we're feeling jolly, hanging lights and holly on the door,

    The secret's out, there is no doubt, it's Christmas time once more.

If the family's acting funny and we're fuming just a bit

    While we're hunting for the bunting that will surely be a hit,

    Christmas shopping has us hopping, we're about to lose our wits,

    And the object that's a project has turned out to be the pits.

If we have no whammy bunting, only clammy hands and sighs

    'Cause we're sick of spending money. Isn't funny, isn't wise.

    So we go into a huddle, still we muddle, agonize,

    While our dreams of finding "perfect" self-destruct before our eyes.

If we'll pitch the lists and flowcharts, let our hearts start thinking small,

    No more reading. What we're needing won't be found within a Mall.

    All the best stuff is the real stuff. Nothing changes, after all,

    It's still love that makes gifts matter, 'spite of chattter in the hall.

So at Christmas time and all the time, this wish comes from my heart:

    May great joy reign, May all your pain and all your stress depart,

    And may every day be one you say, "I cannot wait to start!"

   Then at day's end, let Christ, our friend, speak peace deep in your heart:

(Jesus said) "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." –John 14:27; For unto us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders, and he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. –Isaiah 9:6

So . . . Merry Christ-mas to you and yours! May your heart be filled with JOY because you know the Babe in the Manger came for you–to be your Friend and to set you right with God.

Lovingly,

Lenore



It’s Christmas time once more! (with apologies to all you poets)

December 20, 2017
Quick! What comes to mind when you think of that first Christmas in Bethlehem?

Probably we picture Mary and Joseph beaming their love at the newborn Baby while a bright star overhead shines its light directly on the stable.

We often see illustrations that include a semi-circle of sheep, cows and donkeys that may seem transfixed as they gaze at those human intruders into their world.

How lovely, we think.

Reality would not have been so neat and tidy.

I’ve been around cows and sheep. That shelter would have kept out the cold night air, true, and the animals would have given off heat, but animals give off something else, too. Let’s just say that stable would not have smelled of incense or fragrant spices.

Mary and Joseph never would have chosen such a place.

Yet that lowly stable was God’s appointed place for them that night.

Sometimes life is like that for us, too, isn’t it?

Even when we trust in God. Even when we’re doing what we believe is right. Living our faith. Believing. Trusting. We end up in a place we didn’t choose and we think, that’s not right. Then days or months or even years later, we see the pattern hidden from us in that time.

Think how often we pray and then make what seems a good move. Maybe we go to the right.

God, however, has another direction in mind. Somehow before long we find ourselves going left.

How can this be? Are we not in charge of our lives?

Answer: Not as much as we think and this turns out to be a very good thing

My husband and I got a big lesson in how this works some time ago. For many years we operated a successful modern dairy-grain farm in central Illinois. Life was good.

Then a series of events and people contacts came together in a remarkable way and we left it all behind. Oh sure, we prayed for guidance with all our hearts, more than ever before in our marriage. We came to know, absolutely know, that God was leading us.

For a few months that seemed wonderfully true and we brimmed over with praise and joy.

Then one thing after another fizzled out. There we were in our new life, in that new place where hardly anyone knew us–or cared about us–asking each other and God, “Why?”

We had followed what felt like clear guidance, so it made no sense. At the time.

Later we could see God’s leading in all the twists and turns. Had our original plans worked out we never would have arrived in the good place God planned for us.

Through it all we learned to trust Him in a deeper way than we ever had before. We came to understand that HE knows the way, even when life seems to make no sense to us.

How much more true that was for Mary and Joseph!

Joseph and Mary believed God in what seemed an impossible situation. They believed He went before them, no matter what.

Yet there they were, on that journey to Bethlehem because the Emperor decreed every citizen must go to their town of origin. No exceptions.

Joseph walked, leading the donkey while Mary, in her ninth month of pregnancy, most likely sat on its back.

Even before they reached Bethlehem she felt the first pangs of labor. Despite Joseph’s frantic search, there was no room for them but in that stable.

And God lit up that humble place with His light and His love.

He can light up our lowly places, too

Every one of us occasionally spends time in situations we would not have chosen. All we can do is keep putting one foot in front of the other and pray God will bring good out of our pain and confusion. Pray He will bring healing of body, mind and spirit.

Christmas reminds us nothing is impossible with God.

Because Jesus was born that night you and I can have hope in the midst of our dark times, the times we can’t see the way ahead but still must keep on walking.

God comes to us at just the right time, just as He did in Bethlehem that starry night long ago.

Here’s the Good News for you and for me and for all the world:

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. -John 3:16-17

That verse sums up why we say Jesus is the Light, the One who shines His love and peace into our dark world.

My friend, may HE bring you light and life and peace and JOY, at Christmas and all through the year ahead! It can be yours, just for the asking. Merry CHRISTmas to you and yours!

Warmly,

Lenore

How can we relate our lives today with that long-ago first Christmas?

December 13, 2017
Are you finding it difficult to get into the spirit of Christ-mas? Me, too.

Consider this an intervention.

Take a few minutes to watch these preschoolers answer questions. (I dare you not to smile.)

Charming young children, unscripted answers, what's not to love? Oh sure, they were a bit fuzzy on the details.

Still, in their innocence and simplicity they have the essence of the miracle of Christmas: Jesus came.

Jesus Christ, truly and fully God from before Day One of Creation, chose to come to earth as a human child, born to a human mother.

Jesus, born as a baby in a stable in Bethlehem (Luke 2:1-20.) Born like any human infant to a human mother. Mary, who was a virgin and chosen to be his mother. You see, Jesus was the Son of God. (Luke 1:26-38.)

Joseph's part in the story was that the angel told him he would be Jesus' earthly father and he then married Mary (Matthew 1:18-25.)

Have we heard these readings so often we forget it's a miracle story?

What gets into us adults that we lose our marvels?

Blame it on thoughts of shopping and decorating and keeping up with family traditions. They shout so loudly they drown out the quiet meaning of Christmas.

Do you recognize these questions?

What will I give her? And him?

How much will these gifts cost? Am I spending enough to show I really care?

Will they like what I give them??

I simply have to cook and bake all the family favorites when they come home because that's what they expect. That's what makes it Christmas.

Christmas cards and letters! I need to get them written and mailed in time! And what about photos?

I'm exhausted already. How will I ever get it all done in time?

It's that last question that gets us down

Here's what I've learned over the years–with help from friends and family members.

The best and most lasting gift any of us can give is our love and encouragement. These cost zero dollars.

What we spend–or don't spend–is unimportant. Even young children who clamor for the latest toys on TV always lose interest in any item after a few days.

Recognize that adult and young-adult children are adults and young adults. They will manage to cope even if we don't fulfill their favorite gift requests. (We do, don't we? We know their gifts come with love.)

Cooking everything from scratch does not prove love.

It's a sure thing that this will not be the only chance our loved ones will have all year to eat a good meal.

We can decide to start a new family tradition. Making it easier on ourselves will make it calmer when we're together. (No guilt because Mom looks exhausted.) That makes it more fun for all the family.

Truth flash: Our kids don't come home for the food

Whatever the ages of our children, they come home for the love.

What they long for most of all is affirmation as individuals. The reminder that they belong. The confirmation that we, their parents, love them as they are.

We say it aloud: We love them as they are. That's the biggest gift we can give our adult children.

Are they perfect? No, they're human. Like their parents.

Do we like them as people and/or appreciate their sense of humor or whatever? Then we say so.

Are we pleased or proud about something they've done or are doing? Let's commend them and cheer them on, even if we've said the same thing before.

Are they going through a hard time or a scary passage in life? Let's reassure them that they're not alone. Jesus is with them, every step of the way. (Even if/when they know it, it's good to hear us speak it.)

First, last and always, let's tell them we pray for them every day and we know God's watching over them. (Then let's keep our promise.)

But nobody ever did that for me

Sadly, that's true for many of us. We still may long to hear such words from our own parents. Some of us never will, either because our parents have died or are out of our lives, or because they're incapable of opening up about their emotions.

Then we have a choice. We can grieve and bemoan what we lack.

Or we can forgive our parents and start fresh. Their ways don't have to be our ways.

We give our children and those that matter to us a great gift when we simply say those words of love we ache to hear, not just once, but often.

And in the speaking will be the healing for us and a blessing for them.

God still uses ordinary people

God used ordinary people, Mary and Joseph, carry out His plan. People like you and me.

Jesus told us we are to be salt and light in the earth. We ordinary people are to "season" the world around us and shine the sunshine of God's love where we are.

That starts right where we are. Married or single, with or without children, there are folks around us who need us to live true to who we are in Jesus.

Christmas is more than a season. It's the miracle of God come to earth to live among us.

Christmas is all about God's plan

It's about Jesus, God come to earth in human form, to be our Savior and Lord.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. –John 3:16 ESV

Dear reader, this year when you hear the Christmas story may you feel the awe and wonder of a little child. Jesus came for you!

And for me,

Lenore
Learning about Christmas from a few preschoolers

November 29, 2017
If someone in a neon-green jacket pounded on your door and shouted, "Get out now!" what would you want to take with you?

Did you answer, "The people I love?" Me, too.

Who is ever ready for that?

Thousands of Texans lived out that scenario in the last few days as the slow-moving disaster associated with Tropical Storm Harvey grinds on.

We can't take our eyes off the surreal footage from Texas.

Our hearts ache as we imagine their pain. Their loss. Not only of possessions but of security. Their deep sadness as reality sinks in. What was will never be the same again. Even after the rain stops.

Never ever.

Are we ghouls who love to witness destruction?

Uh-uh. I think it's also the power of that little voice inside that asks, What if that were me? Am I strong enough to survive? To deal with whatever comes?

Then comes the thought that makes us feel guilty: Thank God that's not me.

At least, not this time.

One thing we know for sure. Into every life rain will fall and storms arise. Each of us will face event(s) or situations that feel like a personal tragedy.

That's life in this fallen world.

Texas Gov. Abbott said on-camera that we all deal with challenges, but what defines our lives is how we respond to our challenges.

He ought to know. At age 26, Abbott was out running and a falling oak tree left him partially paralyzed. He's been in a wheelchair ever since.

Each of us has our own definition of "tragedy." How we respond will depend on who we are and what we stand on. What we believe.

Where do we find hope when the waters are rising all around us?

Phrases from an old hymn seem penned for the misery going on right now in Texas:

"My hope is built on nothing less Than Jesus' blood and righteousness . . .

"His oath, His covenant, and blood Support me in the whelming flood . . .

"On Christ, the solid Rock I stand, All other ground is sinking sand."

Rescue may not fully come and yet we must go on. That huge oak tree crushed Greg Abbott's spine. Despite skilled surgeons and rods of steel he could not walk again.

Losses comes in a variety of ways. A loved one dies and no amount of grieving restores life.

A job goes bye-bye or a business goes bust and we lose what we've known as "everything."

All we can do is watch and pray as our "normal" crumbles around us.

What we have is a Rock to stand on

Shelter in our storms. Refuge in our floods. Strong arms to hold us up when we falter.

The sure knowledge in our hearts and minds and yes, in our souls, that we are not hurting alone. Our Lord sees and hears and hurts with us.

After all, didn't He watch His Son suffer and die on the cross?

Didn't Jesus weep when his friend died?

"When every earthly prop gives way, He then is all my Hope and Stay."

The striking fact is how often these people in Harvey's wake speak of praying. Of trusting God to take care of them. Of "doing unto others, as the Bible tells us to do."

These are people who are standing on the Rock because they know Him–and they witness of Jesus Christ to the watching world.

Looking at Texas prompts us to consider our lives

It's good if we do so once in awhile, just to help us keep a balanced view of what really matters in life. Survivors almost always echo the same thought: "Our family is safe and that's all that matters. Somehow we'll get through this."

If that's true for adults, how much more for children.

To a child, Mom and Dad themselves are home and security. It's like the saying on gift shop plaques that reads:

"Home is wherever I am with you."

That's the bottom line for parents and kids and for all family members.

"Things" are not what makes for a good life. To know that's true all we have to do is check out the lives of the rich and famous

Right perspective restored

Whatever the situation, whatever our personal tragedy may be, if those we love are okay and we know our loving Father is watching over us, we are safe and secure.

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 ESV

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

Texan or not, even in the midst of trouble we have reason to give thanks. Life may never be the same and yes, it may be hard. But it is good because we possess what matters most. Life itself is a gift.

Be at peace, my friend,

Lenore

How to get through tragedy when it comes your way

August 30, 2017