Category: Children

Sometimes a chance conversation teaches us a lot. Like the day a friend talked about her childhood.

"Our family was poor when I was growing up," she said, "but I never knew it.

"I remember the year Dad was out of work. Mom suddenly announced she was really tired of fixing turkey every Thanksgiving and announced our First Annual Rice and Beans Festival.

"We kids made silly paper hats out of grocery bags. Mom dug up some old candles and sent us out to pick up pretty leaves to decorate the table. Before we ate we went around the table and each of us, even my bratty brother, said our own thank-you prayer.

"Guess we kids forgot we didn't much like rice and beans because we stuffed ourselves. After dinner we had a contest to see how many blessings we could name, then played games.

"We all still talk of that as the best Thanksgiving ever.

"Friday nights were special, too. We always had popcorn and Kool-Aid. Then we'd sit around and watch TV together or play games. I know now that's all we could afford, but as a child it felt like a party every week.

"Whenever the power went out, Dad would clap his hands and say, 'Let's celebrate!'

"He'd light candles while Mom made peanut butter sandwiches. Then he'd spread out an old blanket and we'd sit in a circle, like around a campfire. We'd sing camp songs and one of us would make up a funny story, then the next one in the circle would have to keep it going.

"We had so many good times, so much laughing–small wonder I thought we must be rich. My parents simply knew how to make the most of every little thing.

"I hate to admit it, but my husband and I and our kids have a lot more stuff now than my parents ever did and we never celebrate any of it."

+++++++

That conversation stayed in my mind for a long time. Obviously, her parents were super-gifted with a thankful spirit. They have a lot to teach . . . me.

A lovely old hymn speaks truth to my heart. How about yours?

For The Beauty Of The Earth

For the beauty of the earth,

For the beauty of the skies,

For the love which from our birth

Over and around us lies,

Lord of all, to thee we raise

This our grateful hymn of praise.

For the beauty of each hour

Of the day and of the night,

Hill and vale, and tree and flower,

Sun and moon and stars of light,

Lord of all, to thee we raise

This our grateful hymn of praise.

For the joy of human love,

Brother, sister, parent, child,

Friends on earth, and friends above,

Pleasures pure and undefiled,

Lord of all, to thee we raise

This our grateful hymn of praise.

Blessings to you, my friend, at Thanksgiving and every day,

Lenore

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November 21, 2013
You probably heard about the Utah coach who suspended his entire football team a week before their big homecoming game.

Coach Matt Labrum had known players were being disciplined for being disrespectful and skipping classes. When some were accused of cyberbullying, it was the last straw.

He decided his Union High team needed a wake-up call.

Labrum told all 80 players they were suspended and to turn in their jerseys. The new emphasis would be on building character and only those who earned the privilege to play would make the team.

He describes it as "an emotional moment on all sides."

Coach Labrum told the Deseret News, "We need to focus on some other things that are more important than winning a football game."

The players got the message. The next day, Saturday, at 7 a.m., all players turned up at Roosevelt Union High, as directed. Labrum explained that to earn their way back they'd need to perform community service. Practice hours would be devoted to character classes.

Right away the players dug in, cleaning up streets, pulling weeds and volunteering at local senior centers. At Monday's character class players were instructed to list their personal character weaknesses–and did.

Several said they now realize it's a privilege to wear their uniforms and represent their school. Senior running back Gavin Nielsen said, "This helped me realize, it's not all about football."

Thumbs up for parents and the community for supporting the coach. And yes, the team will play in that homecoming game.

Like a wise parent, Coach Labrum provided "tough love" along with tender love

Real life is more than football, too. More than winning awards. More than appearance or talent or cleverness or being an honor student. More than getting into the "best" colleges or making a lot of money.

Parents brag about these things, but they're not what matter most.

Otherwise we wouldn't see a steady news parade of individuals with "all the advantages" who are a mess, living out empty lives.

How do we help our kids develop right attitudes?

It starts with helping our kids grow strong from the inside out. Strong enough to make it through life even when they're away from us.

Strong enough to do the right thing, even when everyone else is doing wrong.

It takes loving them with our whole hearts. That's the easy part. The hard part is setting clear limits–and enforcing them. Every time.

Keeping that balance often feels like trying to walk a tightrope and know we need help. We'll find it if we ask. No fancy words needed. A simple, "Help me, Lord, please," is quite enough.

The sooner we start, the better. If we follow through every time, our kids soon figure out Mommy means business and they may as well obey the first time.

Finding our way through

Our call as moms is to help our children grow into people ready to live without us. That often feels like two steps forward and one step back.

It's not all about us.

A solid base of faith and being involved in a strong church which teaches Bible Truth can make all the difference. Here we'll make friends among people who share our values. So will our kids.

Children who know Jesus loves them feel more secure in a harsh world. Knowing their Best Friend is always with them is way better than a cuddly teddy bear.

As youngsters grow into adolescence hanging with Christian kids who support them in making right choices can aid our teens in staying on-track.

The Bottom Line

Being a parent takes all we have and then some. We walk in faith and pray every step of the way.

I used to think that meant I was weak.

Now I know it's exactly the right position to be in.

Lovingly,

Lenore

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September 27, 2013
When sweet, wholesome Hannah Montana becomes Miley Cyrus, what's a mother to do?

If you've been anywhere near a TV or your computer, you couldn't escape seeing shots of Miley Cyrus' performance at the MTV awards show. By all reports it was the opposite of sweet and wholesome.

For years hordes of young girls adored squeaky clean Hannah Montana and so did their moms. So when squealing girls clamored for Hannah Montana lunch boxes and T shirts and all manner of clothing items and accessories moms and dads gladly shelled out hard-earned cash.

What happened, anyway?

First, Miley Cyrus is not the first Hollywood type to disappoint and I'm pretty sure she won't be the last. She craved attention and she got it.

Second, actors act, remember? Hannah Montana was a character created by script writers and carefully maintained by the "Hannah Montana Industry."

Since we can't ignore this, why not seize upon it?

Instead of panic, why not use this for good?

Assume your kids have seen Miley's MTV performance, or at least bits of it, even if they haven't mentioned it.

Remind them that most of what we watch on-screen is acting, or at least, people reading from a script using a teleprompter.

Anyone who ever watched a filming knows contestants are instructed to be entertaining that is, loud. Even audience members clap and cheer when told to.

From now on your kids will be less gullible viewers of TV and movies. That's a good thing.

Star role models have only temporary clout

Researchers frequently interview teenagers and college students, asking who in their lives has been their greatest and most lasting influence.

Results never vary. By an overwhelming majority young people name their mothers and/or their fathers.

Let this sink in deep: You are your children's role model. For life.

Even if they argue with you. Even when they seem to reject everything you say to them. Even though they tell you they can't wait to leave home.

Sometimes that's hard to remember when our child wanders off on a tangent that may last awhile. Then we remind ourselves the end of their story has not yet been written and keep praying.

Every day we leave footprints on tomorrow

Always, what our kids see us do and hear us say matters more than our careful instructions on how to live and act. (That's true even when our children are grown.)

If we're looking for how-tos, the Apostle Paul always gives good advice. Here's a snippet from Ephesians 4:29 and 32 (NIV.)

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen . . . Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

That's not a bad model for you and me within our own family, is it?

Each family will live it their way and that's okay. God creates one-of-a-kinds, remember?

Learning, too,

Lenore

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September 12, 2013
It's back-to-school time and California parents are extra-nervous this year.

Will there be boys in the girls' restroom? Will girl athletes shower with the boys?

Blame it on AB1266, which Governor Brown just signed into law. The stated purpose is to lessen sexual harassment and bullying. Under this new law a boy who'"identifies" with being a girl can use the girls' restroom, locker room and showers. And vice versa.

It's a matter of a student's perception.

A friend asked, "But what can I do about it?"

I wish I had a remedy, but it's the law and students in public schools are subject to it. How it's implemented from school to school probably will differ, but this law will be talked about.

I think it could be helpful to remind your kids who they are and who God created them to be. (Genesis 1:26-27) That hasn't changed.

Start by talking through what you believe as a family and your sexual values. Christian moms will want to discuss how faith influences one's view of all of life.

Your kids may want to talk about what they're going to hear more about, the terms lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender. Clear up any confusion of the specifics of each of these lifestyles.

Keep it light, with give-and-take. Be sure your children get all their questions answered and have a clear understanding. Otherwise they'll be prey to everyone else's ideas.

You may think you're giving way too much information, but remember, anyone can recite biological facts. This is your opening to talk about attitudes and behavior and help your kids set strong values for life.

Start much earlier than you might think you need to

Pay attention to what's being taught in the schools your kids attend. Be alert to information coming from organizations like Gender Spectrum. This agency educates teahcers and administrators in how they should think and how to teach their students the "right" attitudes about sexual identity.

Gender Spectrum also produces books and programs to be used beginning in kindergarten. Their stated goal is to ensure that children grow up free of any sort of gender prejudice.

Sounds all modern and enlightened, doesn't it? They maintain that children need not consider themselves a "boy" or "a girl" just because of their body parts. What matters is, do they feel more like a boy or more like a girl.

Make your home a solid foundation

Let your family be one where anybody can ask any question or bring up any topic without getting put down. Then you'll know what your kids are thinking.

Talk often about why the Bible teaches a different way of living. Talk about how God loves us and wants the best for his people.

Model the kind of talking and actions you want to see in your children and teens.

Get involved in your church as a family. The more time your kids spend on "church stuff," the more likely they'll make Christian friends.

Be a parent who volunteers at school so you know what goes on.

Speak up and write letters when you spot disturbing trends.

Feeling overwhelmed?

Here's the prescription. You and I need to fill our minds with the hugeness of God instead of our own inadequacies by reading Bible verses like this:

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. –Isaiah 41:10

One thing you can know for sure. God watches over your children, always.

Trusting, too,

Lenore

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August 22, 2013
Tornado roars through Moore, Oklahoma. How would we cope if this was where we used to live?

Imagine coming back to this.

Some residents returned to piles of rubble they couldn't see over.

Some found flat, empty spaces littered with debris. They could only trace in their minds where walls once stood.

All cried and hugged each other. Who wouldn't?

In memory their individual homes looked sweet and flawless, filled with precious possessions. The ordinary, boring routines of daily life transformed into cherished rituals.

Tragedy makes our vision clearer

How many interviews have you watched where Moore residents said something like, "Oh, it's all gone, but that doesn't matter. My family is okay. That's all that counts."

We forget that too easily, don't we?

Is it possible to possess that perspective without first suffering a tragedy?

I think we can. I think we must.

That's especially important for moms. In Moore, ten children died. Yes, the school children were with their teachers.

Even so, they faced their fears on their own.

That's life. Even young children spend most weekdays away from home. Older kids and teens, too. We moms can give them something indestructible to hang onto, whatever comes.

Something like this

First we teach our children they can talk to Jesus themselves. We stress that Jesus is with them, right here. Right now.

Songs are good, too. For generations godly moms and grandmas have been teaching, "Jesus Loves Me," to their little ones. Every Sunday School kid learns it, too. It goes like this:

Jesus loves me, this I know,

For the Bible tells me so.

Little ones to Him belong.

They are weak, but He is strong.

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me,

The Bible tells me so.

Jesus loves me–He who died

Heaven's gate to open wide;

He will wash away my sin,

Let His little child come in.

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me,

The Bible tells me so.

–Anna B. Warner, in 1860, set to music by William Bradbury in 1862.

Picture one of those young children huddled down listening to the tornado roar down on them. Wouldn't repeating words like these over and over help them get through it?

We can't give away what we don't have

If we're to speak faith and confidence to our families and those around us we need to be equipped ourselves. We can store up verses like these so we'll have them ready to call up when we need them.

Here are some personal favorites:

*(God says) "Call on me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify me." –Psalm 59:15 (ESV)

*(Jesus says) "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." –John 3:16

*(The Lord says) "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are mine . . . Do not be afraid, for I am with you . . . " –Isaiah 43:1, 5 (NIV)

Make verses like these part of our emergency kit

School kids in Moore had regular tornado drills. Let's take it one step further and aim to be emotionally and spiritually prepared for whatever comes–and our families, too.

Let's equip minds and spirits with what will carry us through.

Lovingly,

Lenore

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May 22, 2013
What prompts the question is a news story in the March 31 edition of The Sacramento Bee.

A local child care center, Tot Town, recently celebrated its 60th anniversary. Ownership has changed over the years, but their philosophy remains the same.

"I tell parents to put their hands behind their backs," says Nancy Ennis, one of the owners, "and let these kids do it (for themselves.)"

At Tot Town, teachers stress independence, so little ones pour their own milk and hang up their own coats.

Here youngsters are treated to "positive discipline." Ennis says they love and respect kids, but expect them to do things in a certain way. Good behavior is rewarded.

One favorite saying is worth adoption in every family: "You get what you get and don't throw a fit."

Teachers are caring, but firm. If a child is reminded how to act and
doesn't, a teacher or helper takes him or her to another activity. "We
don't stand them in a corner or do timeouts," she says. "We redirect."

The philosophy here hasn't changed for sixty years. Graduates frequently stop by for a visit and gaze fondly on old playground equipment. Local graduates who become parents return to enroll their children in the School, so their kids, too, can learn "the Tot Town way."

Timeless truths have a way of surviving

I read the account with a smile because it echoes what I came to believe myself. As a young mom who often felt overwhelmed, I made a lot of mistakes. I talked too much, for example.

But I'm teachable. Here are some things I wish I'd known before rather than after. (They apply equally at any age past infancy.)

Be clear, but brief.

Quietly repeat what you said as often as necessary. Unless you've changed your mind, stick with what you said the first time.

Don't argue. (It takes two to keep it going, remember?)

Explain your reasoning if your child asks why, but recognize it's okay to revert to, "Because I said so," now and then.

If you set clear limits and stay consistent, your kids will feel more secure and know what they can count on. (That's as true for preteens and teens as for preschooolers.) Yes, they'll moan you're too strict. Fuggeddaboudit.

Remind yourself you're the mom. It's okay to act like you're the one in charge.

You're not in this alone

Any time you feel your confidence wavering, remember God gave you your children and if you ask, He will guide you.

Here's a favorite verse for when you feel all churned up. It's John 14:27, where Jesus promises His followers His peace:

(Jesus said) "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

Life is good, being a mom is good and all will be well.

Love,

Lenore

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April 3, 2013
That's bad grammar, I know,

but the phrase imprinted itself on my mind ever since I attended an anti-stress workshop years ago. The leader began with those words and had us repeat it after him, again and again.

It's not a bad slogan for beginning a new year, especially after a year that featured lots of what someone labeled "stinkin' thinkin" on all sides.

Borrowing from that workshop leader, I say, "Enough, already!"

If we adopted that technique it would work like this

The leader would ask, Do you think it's hopeless because you lack some essential qualities to reach your goals? He had an answer: God don't make no junk!

Are you going through a rough patch in your marriage or in your job? Well, cheer up. God brought you and your spouse together and provided that job. And God don't make no junk!

Are you feeling in beyond your depth with being a mom or a dad? Never mind. God obviously considers you able to handle it or He wouldn't have made you a parent. Besides, God don't make no junk! Count on Him to supply wisdom as you need it and strength for each day.

Do you struggle with health problems? Do you or one of your kids have physical or mental challenges and you worry about what comes next? Take heart, you'll be able to handle it, because God don't make no junk!

A look into what this means

I thought of that workshop when I watched this wonderful YouTube a friend sent. Every time I play it, I smile through a few tears.

And can you hear those words? God don't make no junk!

I suggest we adopt a new slogan for 2013, one we can pull up anytime we're feeling unsure about life or the future.

God don't make no junk–and He don't make no mistakes, either.

You and I can walk unafraid, confident we'll be able to handle whatever comes.

For proof we can go deeper than that catch phrase and turn to Bible verses like this one, Psalm 29:11:

The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his peoople with peace.

"His people" includes any of us who love the Lord, so this promise is for us, too.

Thanks for stopping by, my invisible friend. Hope you found something here that blesses your heart.

Love,

Lenore

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January 4, 2013
You probably remember last week's news story from Cranston, Rhode Island, where the High School principal banned the traditional Father-Daughter Dance.

It started when a mother complained, "My daughter does not have an active father in her life, so she can't attend. "It's not fair!"

This same school district lost a court fight last January, so officials were skittish. They knew this one, too, might run up to several hundred thousand dollars in legal fees and court costs. They caved.

Now at Cranston High, no more "gender-discriminatory" activities such as annual Father-Daughter Dances or Mother-Son Baseball Games, even though most students–and parents–previously looked forward to them.

The ACLU commended the District for banning such "inappropriate" activities.

Recapping the earlier case

Another girl complained, "This school has a prayer mural painted on the auditorium wall. "I'm an atheist and don't believe in God, so it's not fair!"

When the school refused to remove it, mother and child went to the ACLU. They sued–and won.

Now a canvas covers this mural. Except for its beginning, "Our Heavenly Father," and its ending, "Amen," this reads like any school's code of good conduct.

No mom or dad needs to go to Rhode Island to hear, "It's not fair!"

Every child is born thinking, It's all about ME.

Part of our job as parents is to help our kids grasp at an early age, "Oh, no, it's not."

We're called to teach them and role-model how to deal with life and to live in society.

Some would say these Cranston incidents and rulings taught students to respect the rights of other people. Others would say these young people learned something else: If you apply enough pressure and threaten to sue, you can get your own way.

Similar practices exist in many schools, as well as in sports activities

Most of us probably remember teachers marking mistakes on our papers with their red pencils and giving letter grades. When we wailed to our parents we didn't get much sympathy. They told us, "Well, study more and work harder and you'll get better grades next time."

These days many schools avoid giving letter grades because it makes some kids unhappy. Teachers avoid red pencils because red looks, well, too harsh.

Once winners in sports and contests got trophies and ribbons at the end of the season. Non-winners complained, but parents and coaches would tell them, "That's life. Not everyone wins. You'll do better if you practice more and get tougher. Practice makes perfect."

Somewhere along the line experts–and moms–decided this kind of talk might injure self-esteem. Now every child gets an identical award, which is thought to be kinder and gentler.

But is it, really?

Hothouse plants wilt easily when exposed to weather

Even though they look luxuriantly healthy, such plants are inherently weaker. They need exposure to the elements to toughen up so they won't wilt when the sun shines hot or the winds blow.

Children and teens are much the same. Sure, we mean to be loving when we aim to shelter them from pain. But that deprives youngsters of experiencing what makes them stronger, ready for life on their own.

Few professors or bosses are impressed by the words, "It's not fair!"

So our best way of showing love to our growing children and teens is to allow them to experience the normal ups and downs of life before they leave home. That's when we're right there, ready to give them a hug and say what feeds their strength, "Aw, c'mon now. You'll live. Next time you'll be wiser and you'll handle yourself better. Now go get 'em!"

To me it comes down to what Jesus said in Luke 6:31:

Do to others as you would have them do to you.

AS we would have them do. None of us would willingly choose to be on the receiving end of what makes us weaker.

Don't we owe our children the same?

Agree or disagree?

Learning along with you,

Lenore

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September 25, 2012
You've probably seen that TV commercial of the mother and her college-bound daughter in the cell phone store.

Both of them talk and weep at the same time, so their words get lost. Daughter tries to reassure her "Hover Mother" they won't be out-of-touch, while the (male) clerk remains mystified. mystified.

Google "hover mothers" or "helicopter parents" and you'll find pages of reading from all over on this hot topic

Hovering starts early

One account described parents who carefully choose a safe neighborhood near schools. Then they declare it's "too dangerous" for their children to walk or bicycle to school alone. They say, "I just want to be sure you're safe, Honey."

What would any normal child conclude? Life is scary.

Maybe that accounts for the twice-daily traffic jams In our quiet, low-crime community at the beginning and end of every school day. Sunshine or rain, cars line up for blocks along tree-lined streets. Watchful moms–and some dads–wait near the crossing guards, ready to walk their kids home. (Parents of middle- and high-school students wait down the street, as instructed.)

Good intentions may be misguided

Planting fear makes children feel powerless.

Our call as loving parents is to help our kids grow strong within themselves.

Instead of hovering, we get our child ready for the "what ifs" of life. Talking it through and offering specific actions can produce courage and calm thinking, like youngsters in news stories who escaped harm by running away, screaming loudly or calling 911.

Somebody helped them be mentally prepared.

Love doesn't gallop to the rescue every time our child calls. Take the youngster with a habit of "forgetting" crucial homework or even lunch. No more lectures. No more temper. First comes a warning, then one rescue. After that Mom says, "Sorry, Sweetie. You're on your own. Talk to your teacher and see what you can work out."

Call it tough, or label it a taste of how the world works. A learning step toward being responsible.

We stay tuned, but from a distance. It's as if we hold up a sign that reads, "We believe in you!" If they stumble, we pick 'em up, give 'em a hug and encourage them to try again.

As Christian moms we want our child's long-term best. Working through situations like this on their own imparts the sense they can deal with whatever comes.

Our mission as parents is to love our kids and let them go

Teens and young adults learn to make wise decisions by (sometimes) making unwise decisions. We allow them to try–and sometimes fail–and learn.

Is this easy? No! Sometimes it feels like the hardest thing we've ever done. The near-hysterical mom in the cell phone commercial would be the type who delivers daily wake-up calls to her child's dorm room. (Yes, it happens.)

Moms feel separation anxiety, too. We look at the years we invested in protecting our child, wanting to make sure she grows up with only happy memories. We wonder how our beautiful children can get along on their own.

If not before, now's the time.

Setting our children free, ready and willing to live without us, bestows a love gift that keeps on giving.

Moms never stop praying

We love our children best when we leave "hovering" to the One who knows the end before the beginning. He never takes His watchful eyes off our loved ones and He knows what they need most. Our task is to keep on praying and trusting.

Here's a Bible verse to encourage us:

. . . The prayer of a righteous [mother} is powerful and effective. –James 5:16 NIV (If you don't feel "righteous enough," read Romans 3:22-24 and 5:19.)

Lovingly,

Lenore

Mother love that strengthens our children

May 21, 2012
We moms pray for our kids all their lives, that God would keep them safe. But have you ever prayed about cinnamon?

Yep. Turns out it has become a real danger for preteens and teens.

Oh, it's not the cinnamon on a yummy breakfast roll or a piece of fragrant cinnamon toast that causes problems.

Rather, it's "the cinnamon challenge," which at first sounds silly and harmless, like many acttivities that catch on with adolescents.

This one goes beyond risky to extremely dangerous.

How could common, wonderful-smelling cinnamon be a hazard? Melissa Arca, M.D., laid out the facts in her Sacramento Bee article of April 10, 2012.

According to Dr. Arca, the cinnamon challenge amounts to a public dare–and what adolescent can resist a dare? That's part of the problem. The other part is it doesn't sound particularly hazardous, even to adults. What could be so bad about swallowing a simple tablespoon of dry cinnamon in under 60 seconds without drinking anything?

Here's the catch. Cinnamon cannot be dissolved by saliva alone.

Dr. Arca says once a person has that much dry cinnamon in their mouth and tries to swallow it, gagging and choking immediately follow. What's more, the choking usually leads to vomiting and sometimes, to aspirating cinnamon into the lungs. Lung collapse may follow, or pneumonia. Some who try it even end up on a ventilator. Kids with asthma are extremely vulnerable and could experience a severe attack.

She advises immediate medical intervention, which strikes me as an unrealistic statement. What kid would try this while their pediatrician–or parent–stands nearby?

Because Dr. Arca stated that poison control centers report a recent spike in calls about the cinnamon challenge, I checked the website of the American Association of Poison Control Centers.

They AAPCC issued a press release warning dated March 28, 2012. In it they explain that powdered or ground cinnamon quickly coats the mouth and throat, which interferes with swallowing . Breathing difficulty follows and teens may unintentionally breathe the spice into their lungs. This can cause pneumonia and/or a serious attack for asthmatics.

Social media takes it viral. Again

Predictably, teens and preteens want to post "funny" videos of themselves or someone else attempting to pull it off on their cell phones or on YouTube.

That's why you can Google "the cinnamon challenge." It has its own website, Facebook page and Twitter handle.

Even Wikipedia lists "cinnamon challenge." That entry notes that cinnamon contains coumarin, a moderately toxic chemical compound. It also notes that European health agencies have warned against ingesting "large amounts" of cinnamon.

We might write this off as a fad, just more amusing antics of the young if it weren't life-threatening.

Building in strength to resist dares like these

Most parents, grandparents and caregivers already warn youngsters over and over about the need to be cautious and careful. Every day in every way.

(As you've probably noticed, kids specialize in tuning out such lectures.)

It seems to me a more hellpful strategy is to aim our efforts at helping our kids develop inner strength–and the sooner, the better. That means talking to our children from little on about making good choices. It helps if they see us living this out ourselves.

No way can we keep our kids in a cage, like exotic birds. They're growing up in the real world. Moms and dads need to equip them to live in it.

Teach them the line you probably heard from your mom:

It doesn't matter what someone else does or says, it's up to YOU to choose what you will do.

It's as true now as ever.

Talk empowerment instead of restrictions

Especially during their adolescent years, youngsters ache to belong. Some habitually look around them to see what others are doing, then mimic it. Blame it on the desire to be popular or on fear of being left out.

At any age, real strength and freedom come from within, from quietly knowing who we are and what we stand for. If our children have a faith background they'll have an advantage during adolescence. Christian kids learn early on about the difference between right and wrong. They also hear often that God loves and forgives them even when they mess up.

Helping our kids establish and rely on their inner standards is like equipping them with inner armor. Knowing what's good and right and true gives them a sure path through the hazards that lurk all through these preteen and teen years.

Hazards like the cinnamon challenge, all the things youngsters will view as fun, nothing more.

Maybe that's why we keep on praying.

Blessings,

Lenore

Moms, did you know cinnamon could be dangerous?

April 13, 2012